You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen episode number 149. Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, fortune 100 executive, and certified life coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Ooh 149 ladies. I can’t believe it. Hello my love. So happy to be here with you today. We have new ladies in Transform Boss Weight Loss, and I am just loving them up. We also in August have our Transform Boss live this month. I love it. It’s twice a year. We do a virtual event just for ladies who are in Transform Boss Weight Loss, and it’s a half day event with the ladies, oh, I just can’t even. And this theme in August is all about becoming the hero of your own story. Ladies, it’s going to be good.

So, you know, I love this topic because I think for so many women, including myself, we have this fear of gaining the weight back. Because we have. And we felt so much shame about, you know, when we gained weight back. It was, you know, people could see it. They knew that we had failed, and it was on the outside of us. And so when I was losing weight, I had failed so many times. I would lose a few pounds and then shoot, I’d gain it back in a weekend. Or I would buckle down, lose 50 pounds, and gain it back over the next year. I did this so many times and I developed this fear of “what if I gain it back?” and that’s in quotation marks.

So what would happen is I would not even really start to “try again.” Or if I did, I was kind of halfway in. I want you to ask yourself right now, you can pause this or just ask yourself in your head, do I fear that if I lose my weight, I’ll gain it back? Or will I gain back the weight that I’ve already lost? Just ask yourself that question, and just see what pops in your head. It’s important to know what just popped in your head so that you can be aware of your thinking. Because your thinking will always be the determining factor in your results, in your outcomes.

If you want to lose weight and get off the diet rollercoaster for good, you have to one, be aware of your thoughts, and two, start believing new things. I see this with my bosses. You know, they’re losing weight, or they’ve lost it, they’re in maintenance, but they are anchored into some old identity that did not have the tools or the support that they have now. So they start to have this fear.

See what happens is you can anchor yourself into an old identity. And it’s so important to understand this. For many, many years, I anchored myself into the identity of a 22-year-old single mom who was overweight and didn’t know what to do. I love her when I think about my 22-year-old self, but it’s not who I am today. My thinking, my actions, my beliefs they’ve changed. And so I had to start to identify with who I am today. I had to find the successes that are really happening, not the old beliefs. See, you’re always evolving, you’re changing.

And our brains, a lot of the times, they just don’t reconcile with who we are. Remember, our brain is always scanning for danger, and we have all the old memories and beliefs that are stored in our automatic brain. And so our brain can get anchored into some old version of ourselves, even though that’s just not even who we are anymore. As you’re learning my process to get off the diet rollercoaster and lose weight for the very last time, as you’re deciding to believe new things, you have to start believing that you’re losing it for the last time.

This belief that I’m not going to gain it back, that you’re losing it in a way that you can always do, how you’re losing it is how it’s always going to be. I saw a post the other day on social media of someone who had lost weight, was feeling super proud. She’s absolutely gorgeous. This is someone who I’m just, you know, acquaintances with, it’s outside of my process, and she said this statement that she’d start reintroducing carbs once she had lost the weight. I love her. And I hope that she keeps it off for good. But my initial thought was, oh no, she’s not losing it in a way that she can always do.

See in my experience, if you don’t lose it in a way that you can always do, eating all the foods, healing your relationship with food so you don’t have fear, so your body also gets accustomed to losing weight and maintaining weight eating all the foods that you enjoy, that you like, what happens is you’ll lose the weight and then you’ll start to eat like you did prior to losing the weight, even if you don’t eat as much, but you’ll start to regain it. And this is so important, because losing your weight, believing new things, learning how to heal your relationship with food, it is the way to long term weight loss. If you are fearing gaining your weight back, whether you haven’t even lost a pound, you’re on a plateau, or you’ve lost your weight, here are five just tips I have for you.

One, ask yourself the question, is this a fear that I have? Do I fear gaining the weight back? And how is it affecting me? See, this awareness is just the first step. Understanding that this could be a fear that you have that is actually sabotaging your weight loss, it’s actually keeping you from moving forward. Or maybe you’re starting to gain weight back, and just understanding that it’s just coming from a fear from an old belief.

Two, find the successes that you have today and who you are today. Identify with who you have become, not some old version of yourself. Three, lose weight slowly. Really slowly, methodically, by healing your relationship with food and yourself. Four, lose weight in a way that you can always do, eating all the foods. Do not diet. My love, stop the quick fixes. They do not work for long-term weight loss. Look at any study. Look at the percentages of folks who lose weight long-term. They just do not work. And number five, give yourself some love and grace. Because you are beautiful and amazing right now today. The number on the scale does not define you or your worth.

And if you want to take this work deeper than go take my free course at freebosscourse.com. It’s where I take this work deeper. So good, and teach you my basics. All right my love. I will see you next week. Talk to you for a very especial 150^th episode. I can’t wait. Join me next week. Bye for now. Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come on over to bflycoaching.com. See you next week.