Ep #168: 3 Things That Have Helped Me Be Successful

I teach a concept in Transform Boss Weight Loss called C work with your best effort. This is about getting out of perfectionism and focusing on the process not the external number. You have to learn to focus on your success rather than your failures.  Failures are just stepping stones to your success.  Join me in this episode as I talk about the core steps that have helped me be successful in getting off the diet roller coaster for good.

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You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women Podcast with Shannan Christensen, episode number 168. Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, fortune 100 executive, and certified life coach, Shannan Christensen.

 

Hello love. So happy to be back with you. I have been doing reflecting. I love to look at my past year and celebrate my successes and see how far I’ve come. And I was thinking back to what have been the core things that have helped me to be successful in getting off the diet rollercoaster for good. And so today I’m going to share some of that with you. I mean, it is December. I know. Can you even believe it, ladies? I always say this, but I know you’re, if you’re anything like me, you’re always surprised when it comes and how fast it goes. And you know, I’m just excited. I’m excited for all the fun things and family and rest and really celebrating 2022, and then getting excited about 2023. And I really am excited. I feel very blessed and I love this life. And even though there’s challenges, and of course everything is 50 50, you know, I love the blessings of it all.

 

So today’s show, let’s get into it. There are three things that I want to talk about that I think have been core fundamentals of what have really helped me get off the diet rollercoaster. Now, you know, I have my four basics and my four fundamentals that I teach in long term weight loss. But this that I’m gonna talk about today is more around the process and ooh, they’re good. So number one, you know, as you’re on this journey to losing weight for the last time, you start to create habits.

 

You have thousands of habits,  really, honestly, I don’t even know how many, right? We do habits all the time. And in that, it’s so amazing, right? You’re creating new things. You’re starting to maybe make your realistic plan or get your water in, or you’re starting to practice your one better thought and thinking differently, and that’s amazing. But doing it with C work with your best effort. So I teach this concept called C work with your best effort. This is about getting out of your perfectionistic mind and focused on the process, not the external number, not one data point.

 

You know, we like data, we like black and white, concrete things. But moving forward, having success, there’s a whole bunch of gray, and it’s doing things one, and not seeing the results right away. And also understanding that these new habits that you’re creating, you’re not going to do them a hundred percent of the time. Yes, not a hundred percent of the time. You know, there’s only a few things in my life that I do 100% of the time. I mean, off the top of my head, it’s like I do brush my teeth every single day. I don’t miss a day of that. That’s probably like the one thing that is 100% of the time. I mean, I eat, right and drink water, but like self-care things, brushing my teeth, right? And taking a bath, I’m probably 98% of the time.

 

Most habits that I have are anywhere from 70 to 95% of the time. When I think of that, I think of it as a success. So I make my realistic plan, and I say I do it every day, but there are days that I don’t, and there are days that I don’t do it until after I eat lunch. And then I’m like, oh, shoot, I gotta get going. I gotta, I haven’t done my reflection work today. I haven’t done my realistic plan. And again, ladies, I say this because, but in my brain, how I think about it is that I do it all the time. See, doing it all the time is subjective. What does all the time mean? A hundred percent, 98%, 97%. It’s what you make it mean.

 

See, you can make it mean that if you don’t do it 100% of the time, that you’re a failure. And for most of us, that’s how we think about things. If I’m not doing this 100% of the time, then I’m a failure. But I tell you, if you want more success, it’s opposite of what you think and what you, your brain wants to believe. But if you start focusing on, you know what, I don’t need to be perfect. I don’t need to be perfect. When you think you have to be perfect, you just don’t even start. You don’t even do the things that are gonna make your life amazing, because you think you have to do it a hundred percent of the time.

 

But when you start to realize that by doing something 50, 60, 70% of the time that it’s gonna lead to massive results, that you’re gonna start seeing amazing progress. If you keep focusing on your failures, then that’s what you’ll have. No action. Living in automatic robot mode. One of the things that have been key to my success is see, work with my best effort. Some days I’m all in. Some days I get it all done and I’m like, Woohoo. Other days I’m like 50%. And I say this because this is so important in your journey, if you keep not doing things because you think you have to do them perfectly, you will live just this life of automatic, just doing the things, doing things for other folks, not working on yourself so that you can live the best life and live in a body that you love.

 

The second thing is, I focus on my successes. I have learned to find all of my successes and focus on them. And this is a big part. I tell you ladies, I would say in the last five years, I just keep getting better at this over and over and over again. Again, no perfectionism, but I really do every day try to think about what am I doing right? How is it working? And you know, last week’s episode was all about the Gap and the Gain. And you know, I loved, I just read that book this year, but I’ve been doing this for a long time, focusing on what is working, what is successful?

 

And you know, losing this, you know, ideal that it has to be perfect. And also not comparing myself to other people. You know, anytime I start comparing myself, it’s just a trigger that I need to do some reflection work, or I need to get coached. Because that, to me, anytime I’m comparing, it’s just negative thinking and it’s not helpful. It doesn’t one, make me do anything different. It just makes, kind of shuts me down. It makes me feel like I’m failing. And so most of what I try to think most when I’m doing my reflection work and different things every day I write what I’m successful at, what’s working, what am I doing?

 

And it’s not that I never, of course, look at my challenges. I, of course, I look at them, but I look at them so that I can see, is this something I wanna focus on? Is this something I want to change or is this just part of the process? I just ask myself, what am I learning from it? I don’t make it mean that anything’s gone wrong. Ladies, when we focus on this number, this number, right, this weight, when every day we get on and we beat ourselves up, and if it’s good, we’re good. If it’s bad, we’re bad. Instead of just, it’s a number, it’s one data point. And while I was losing my weight, I tell you these, I started to become just so disconnected from that number.

 

I had a goal in my mind, but I wasn’t even quite sure what it was gonna totally be. I just thought, you know what? I’m gonna focus on the process. I’m gonna focus on my success. And when I started focusing on the process and what I was doing right, I started to have more success. Ladies, I say this a lot in Transform Boss, we just had a workshop, the part five of healing you. And you know, I told ladies, learning this, learning to focus on your success, learning how to see what you’re doing right is so important because if not, if you keep focusing on what you’re doing wrong, if you keep focusing on your challenges, then you could be 90 years old still worrying about 10 pounds that you thought you should have lost because it was some number you weighed when you were 20 years old.

 

And that is the truth. When you focus on your successes, what is working? When you start loving the body you’re in now, it’s all thoughts. When you start feeling comfortable in the skin that you live in now. You start loving the skin that you’re in, you start appreciating it, that it’s moving, that it’s working, that you start focusing on the process. Like, what is the thing I can do for myself today. Ladies, that is when you’re gonna start having success.

 

Number three, putting things in small, simple action steps. I learned this a long time ago, probably 20 years ago. It was from this book, I was all, you know, I was in corporate world and I really wanted to focus on my productivity. And I read this book called Getting Things Done by David Allen. And I loved this book. I still use so many of the concepts today. I think it’s the best time leadership, time management book out there. And one of the things he talked about that just, ugh, I do this now in every part of my life, is that our brains think of things in projects, like big things.

 

So like you might say to yourself, I need to lose weight. Well, there’s about a million action steps in losing weight, right? I mean, think about it. There’s all these little tiny actions that you have to do. And so when you think of things in big projects, it just makes you feel overwhelmed, and then you keep putting them off because it feels overwhelming, right? When you think, oh, I gotta do this coursework in Transform Boss. But you think you have to do the whole course instead of like, Hey, I’m gonna do this, you know, three minute course video today, right?

 

So it’s all about taking these big things like losing weight or doing the coursework, getting coached, whatever it is, and putting it into a small, tiny action step. So I do this in all parts of my life, and I just focus on one to two things at a time. Because if I just focus on one to two things, then I can start to up level and I can continue to build on them. When I was losing my weight, I focused on my realistic plan and reconnecting to my body. And reconnecting to my body was just simple questions I asked myself like, am I physically hungry? How is my body feeling? I didn’t expect perfection. Every day, this has turned into what I like to call my top three. Every day I have a top three. These are three actions that I’m gonna do. I have them for work and for my self-care. Just three simple actions, not big projects. And then when I accomplish them, I take a moment and I celebrate.

 

It could be a high five to myself or just a deep breath. And I say to myself, nice work Shannan. And I tell you ladies, that celebration, it goes back to number two, focusing on my successes. It just helps me continually build on my successes by doing simple steps. I tell you ladies, we think we need to do all the things. I did this for so long. When I was on the diet rollercoaster, I was like, okay, I’m gonna lose weight, I would tell myself at the beginning of the year, I’ve gotta do all the things.

 

I see ladies that come into Transform Boss, or like, I gotta do all the things. It’s like no, one to two things. I say this, so many, one to two things, focus on one to two things. And I tell you ladies, because when you do, they start compounding, you start having more success. Ugh, it’s so important. So number three is just putting things in simple action steps.

 

So the three things that have helped me in so many areas of my life, get off the diet roller coaster, have a successful career, bettered my relationships are creating habits, but doing C work with my best effort, focusing on my successes and the process. And number three, putting things into simple action steps. To change your life you just need to focus on this moment and today. What is the next best action that you can do for yourself right now?

 

And if you wanna take this work deeper, take my free course. Go to freebosscourse.com and you can then sign up there. All right my love, bye for now. Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and wanna learn more, come on over to bflycoaching.com. See you next week.

 

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