Ep #14: Your Future Self

We just had an early Christmas celebration with our family a few days ago, and I was asking my grandkids what they want to be when they grow up. And every time, their answers amaze me. Kids love to dream. Then, as life goes on, we gradually stop dreaming.

We tell ourselves that whatever we have is good enough and we should be grateful. However, loves, dreaming just like we did when we were kids is still possible for us, while still being grateful for what we have.

Join me on the podcast this week as I introduce a concept called Future Self. This work has propelled everything that I do today. Everything I do, even the small stuff, takes who I want to be in the future into consideration, and this practice is changing my whole world. The future starts today, not tomorrow.

 


What You’ll Discover:

  • Why we stop dreaming as we go through life.
  • How to start dreaming about the future passionately again.
  • Why intentionally thinking about my future self has made a huge difference in the trajectory of my life.


Listen to the Full Episode:


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Full Episode Transcript:

 

You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen, episode number 14.

Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, Fortune 100 Executive and Certified Life Coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Hello, loves. First I want to wish all of you a Merry Christmas or a happy holiday season. I know this episode will be released on Christmas Day, so just wishing you so much love, whether it’s Christmas Day or any other day that you’re listening to it.

So, I love today’s topic. It is one of my favorite things. We are all going to get ready today for 2021 or 2025? What did I just say? I know, we’re going to talk about your future self. It is so good. And as always, I will leave you with a couple of transformational questions to start taking action today.

But first, I want to give a listener shout-out. This is where I’ll read a review of the podcast every week. This week’s listener shout-out is to Jelly Bean 477. The title of her review is “Life-Changing Stuff Found Here. You won’t find a more dedicated, supportive, real or knowledgeable coach anywhere. Shannan is the most genuine and loving person, using her personal experience and lessons learned to help us be the best we can be.”

Oh my goodness, thank you so much, Jelly Bean 477. I just love these reviews. They really do inspire me. I love that you ladies are listening. If you love this show, please rate and review the show. I would so appreciate it.

Also, subscribe so the new episodes are waiting for you when they’re released. Loves, as I record this, we just celebrated our Christmas yesterday with our family. It was amazing. We had all of our children, grandbabies, my brother, his wife, my dad. You know, it was such an amazing time. I really was present and kind of just enjoyed the crazy of it. I mean, with four grandbabies, it’s pretty high energy.

And, we did it early this year because my husband is having surgery. And I’ve been thinking a lot lately about this concept that we have a 50-50 life. Meaning it’s balanced between the amazing and wonderful, and the hard and painful. I mean, for sure, sometimes it’s 90-10, or even 10-90, but in the end, it all balances out.

I love this concept, because it helps me embrace the 50% that is hard. Like when we found out my husband was going to have two surgeries within two weeks in December. I mean, when we found out I cried, I was worried. But loves, I felt all of the emotions of it and I didn’t buffer. And, they came and went until we got the all clear from the doctor. And then, loves, we did, and he is all good. And loves, then I was elated.

I mean, that’s how life, the crazy balance of amazing and hard, and lots of stuff in between. When we stop resisting the hard, when we embrace it, loves, everything changes. When we’re present in those moments that are amazing, we fully embrace the good, too. Our lives are more full. We are more present with everything.

When we know that we can handle anything, I mean anything, and still take the next best action for ourselves? Loves, we become on stoppable. I wanted to share, because I hope this helps as you move through this week, or wherever you are.

So, let’s get into today’s episode. I love watching my grandkids and asking them questions. I like to ask them, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” So, I asked my two older grandkids, and every time their answers amaze me. I mean, mostly my oldest grandson, he wants to be Sonic.

When I was in high school, I wanted to be a fashion designer, living in New York. I mean, when we’re kids, we just love to dream. Then comes college, or family, jobs, marriage or no marriage, kids or no kids, aging parents. And loves, we stopped dreaming. We get into the daily routines of our lives and we’re just like robots, going from one day to the next.

Add in the hard stuff that happens along the way. Challenges, divorce, death, job loss, changes, health issues, and loves, we just give up on ourselves. We tell ourselves, “This is good enough.” “I should be grateful for what I have.” Or, “This is my lot in life.”

But loves, we can dream. We can look up and want things for ourselves. We can want to grow, learn, achieve goals that we thought were impossible, all while being grateful for what we have. Time is always moving. I know, ladies, you feel me on this. I mean, I really do believe as you get older, it just keeps moving faster.

And so today I want to introduce a concept that my teacher taught me, that I loved, and it’s called future self. I mean, I love this concept and it has propelled everything for me. Everything I do today is for my future self, the future self of 2021 or 2025.

If I decide to make my realistic plan and eat what’s on it, that affects my future self. If I show up at my business, or not, that affects my future self. If I decide to save money, that affects my future self. So, let’s go back. Everything I did 10 to 15 years ago affects me today. I’m either benefiting from it, or not.

So, when I decided to marry my amazing husband 11 years ago, I was making a decision for my future self When I decided to stop dieting five years ago and find a different way, I was making a decision for my future self.

Loves, looking back at myself over the past 10 to 15 years, I am so happy, what I did for myself. I had goals, I did hard things. I knew what I wanted for my future. I am so thankful for that Shannan. I mean, she married an amazing man. She went back for her MBA. She learned how to lose weight, how to take care of herself. She got certified as a life coach. She was a good mom and Mimi.

I’m so grateful that Shannan showed up and did hard things, because now, I get to benefit from all of it. So everything I do today is for her, for the Shannan of 2025. Just think about that for a moment, loves. Stop and think. Everything you do today is for her.

I know that dreaming and looking at the future can be hard. We don’t trust ourselves, because we have let ourselves down so many times. We’ve broken commitments to ourselves, but loves, your future starts today, not tomorrow. I learned early in my leadership career that I had to set goals. I had to dream. I had to know where I was going. So, I did. I learned how to write down my goals, how to make decisions that served me.

Now loves, there is no straight line or path. But don’t use “I don’t know what will happen” to not plan your future. Having a plan and taking action today for your future self helps you to get where you want to go, because loves, the future will happen one way or the other.

It is often small, boring things that are the contributions to your future self. Like my morning walks, like eating foods that fuel me, like resting, making my realistic plan every day. It’s not the momentous, huge, big things. It’s the small things that, with time, make a huge impact.

Hear me when I say this. Time plus consistency equals results. And those results are either good or bad. So, I’m going to say it one more time. Time plus consistency equals results, good or bad.

I look up and ask, “Who is my future self? What does she do for a living? What does she look like? How does she take care of herself? How much money does she make? What do I want for my family, my grandkids? How can I help them today?” And then I write it down. And, a couple times a year, I actually write a letter to my future self.

I really think about the 2021 or 2025 version of me. Is your 2025 self still struggling with weight? Or is that in her rearview mirror? Now, who is your future self, love? And what are you going to do for her today? I mean, loves, that is where the magic lies. When I don’t want to get out of bed for my walk in the morning, I think about my future self and I ask, “What would she do?”

I mean, she’d get out of bed. My future self has more wisdom, she has grown, and my future self is my best mentor. Doing this work, looking at your future self, dreaming, it’ll help you when you want to give up. When in the short term, you want to try another quick-fix diet, or you want to eat the cupcake, ask yourself, “What would she do? What would my future self do?”

Oh, it’s so powerful, love. So the transformational questions are, who is your future self of 2021 or 2025? And number two, what can you do today for your future self? Loves, so good.

Jumpstart is opening on January 1st, it’s almost here. It’ll be open for six days. And if you love this work and want to take it deeper to lose weight for good, then make sure that you’re on the Jumpstart waitlist. You can register at bflycoaching.com/waitlist.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come on over to bflycoaching.com. That’s B – F – L – Y coaching dot com. See you next week!

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Ep #13: How Wanting to Be “Normal” Leads to Deprivation

For so many years, when I would go out and see skinny people – especially eating dessert – I would think to myself, “Why can’t I be normal, like her?” And I didn’t realize it at the time, but that perception of normal, that I had made up in my head, was leading to so much drama for me. It’s crazy.

I just wanted to be this definition of normal for so long. I wanted to eat whatever I wanted, eat all the sugar, and not gain a pound. Then, while at a retreat, I realized that this desire to be normal was really creating only one thing in my life: deprivation.

Listen in this week, love, and discover the truth about what it means to really be normal, why our perception of normal is not grounded in reality, and how chasing this idea of eating whatever you want and being comfortable is always available to you.

And here are this week’s transformational questions:

  1. What thoughts do you have right before you eat off-plan or overeat?
  2. What thoughts are causing you to feel deprivation?

  3. What if you feel the feeling of deprivation? What would change for you?

If you love this work and you want to take it even deeper to get off the diet roller coaster for good, you need to check out my signature program, Jumpstart. Doors will be opening on January 1st 2020 for six days only, so to get early access and more information, register here!


What You’ll Discover:

  • How confirmation bias influences our perception of what is normal.
  • Why it’s impossible to know the full truth about someone else’s relationship with food and their body.
  • What normal in the USA actually means from a diet and weight perspective.
  • Why you are always in control, even when it feels like you’re eating uncontrollably.


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:


Full Episode Transcript:

 

You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen, episode number 13.

Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, Fortune 100 executive and Certified Life Coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Hello, love. I’m so happy to be back with you. I’m a little under the weather. I have a little head cold, which is a sign to me that I’m doing too much maybe, it’s Christmas time, and not resting enough. Honestly, I never get sick. I can go years without having a cold or any kind of sickness.

And so this week, I’m really looking at, what am I doing and am I resting? And then also, am I resisting some of my feelings? You know, love, I’ve been doing a lot of reflection work this week, but in today’s show, we’re going to talk about being normal and how it leads to the feeling of deprivation.

I love this topic because it’s a thought I had for most of my life. If I just could be normal. I thought all of the skinny people were normal and I was not. And as always, I will leave you with a couple of transformational questions so you can start taking a little bit of action today.

But you know, first, I want to give a listener shout-out. This is where I will read a review of the podcast every week. This week’s listener shout-out is to KMG3614. The title of her review is Relatable, “It’s so refreshing to listen to someone so relatable and have hope that the answer to my diet rollercoaster is right around the corner. Hope is what I’m feeling after listening.”

Thank you so much, KMG3614. I love these reviews and I really appreciate all the ladies that are listening. If you love this show, please rate and review it. I would just so appreciate it. And then also subscribe to the show wherever you listen. So, every Wednesday, this show is just waiting for you in your podcast library.

So, when this is being released, it will be the week before Christmas. And I just can’t believe it’s the end of the year. I mean, we just put up our tree and all of our Christmas decorations. And honestly, this is my favorite time of the year. I don’t know about you ladies, but I really do love it.

Now, last year, we were building our current house and we had sold our other house, so we were living in an apartment. And I didn’t even put up our tree last year. All of our stuff was in storage. And last year, our house was supposed to be finished at the end of November, but a few delays happened and we actually didn’t move in until January of this year.

So I am just so excited to have Christmas at our house this year. It’s the first year that we’re having it in this house, and all the traditions, you know, we’re baking cookies, making gingerbread houses, doing all the fun things that we like to do with the grandbabies, you know.

I still enjoy all the fun stuff and all of our traditions without feeling deprivation or restriction. And honestly, I’m going to make some cookies this weekend, so I’ll just add a few cookies to my realistic plan on Saturday, no drama involved. That’s the power of the realistic plan.

So, deprivation and restriction lead me right into today’s episode. I’m going to talk about the thought, “I just want to be normal.” This is something that I always wanted. I wanted to be normal. I thought normal was eating whatever I wanted. I used to really wish – I mean, you ladies feel me on this – for a magical pill where I could eat whatever I wanted.

I wanted to eat all the sugar. I wanted to be skinny and eat loads of cookies and chocolate and whatever I wanted. I would look at a thin person and think, “What would it be like to be normal and eat whatever I wanted?” Because, of course, when I would see a thin person, you know, they would be eating dessert or something I thought I could not eat on my diet.

Nd honestly, love, that’s just confirmation bias, and I’m going to talk about that in a future episode. But, loves, being normal in this country is being overweight. 71% of adults over the age of 20 are overweight or obese according to the CDC. Yes, you heard me correctly, 71%.

We, as a nation, are carrying extra weight. We believe that something is wrong with us, but the crazy part that I’ve learned is that dieting led me to being overweight, the rollercoaster of overeating or restriction. When I was dieting, I made it all about the food and whatever diet plan I was on.

But, love, it has never been about the food. It has always been about my thoughts and beliefs. This thought that I just wanted to be normal also led me to the thought, “Well if I could just eat in moderation.” I wanted to be able to eat in the middle. I was either binging, overeating, or restricting. And I thought if I could just eat in moderation, I would be good.

Honestly, loves, I just could not figure it out. I remember my last try at moderation. I mean, I loved ice cream sandwiches and I thought, if I could be, quote unquote, good, all day, which, love, meant restriction, counting some form of calorie or point, then every night, I would get, as a reward, an ice cream sandwich.

But, loves, one ice cream sandwich would turn into two, and then eating a cookie, and then it just led to this downward spiral because I was not planning and I did not have any control over my lizard brain, I would overeat. And then, loves, you know what happens next. I would beat myself up.

It was such a vicious cycle, I was not connected with my body and eating from a place of love.

I was just eating to eat, meaning eating to buffer and avoid feelings. I had an unmanaged mind, so after that failed attempt at moderation, I just went back to overeating. This is the thing, love, being normal, eating whatever I wanted, was a faulty thought because a lot of the time, I was eating whatever I wanted, and I didn’t like that either.

I did not like the obsession or how it made me feel. I did not like the thought that I was out of control. I remember walking into a grocery store to pick up my next fix, some form of sugar. And because I had been overeating, nothing even looked that great. But I was obsessed. I needed the sugar. So I would pick something up and then go overeat.

What changed things for me was learning that I always had a choice. I’ve always been able to eat the cupcake or not. It’s always been my decision, my choice. I was always in control. The idea that something takes over us is just not true. We’re making the decision, whether we want to acknowledge it or not.

I had to become a watcher of my thoughts and know which thoughts were poison to me. I had to learn that being normal was a poisonous thought for me. It just didn’t lead anywhere good.

I wanted to be normal because I was tired of feeling deprivation. I just didn’t want to feel it anymore. I didn’t want to feel like I couldn’t have something. And when I was dieting, I would go to – ladies, you feel me on this – you’d go to a family event, there’s a ton of desserts and if I saw someone eat one, then I would have the thought, “I just wish I was normal and could eat that.”

Then it would cause the feeling of deprivation. Restricting what I ate led to these feelings of deprivation and self-pity, and those feelings I did not want to feel. So then, I would buffer and then go off my diet, and then I would be on the full diet rollercoaster.

I literally did this for most of my life. This one thought of being normal led to lots of overeating. And I’ve also learned that just because someone is thin, does not mean they can eat whatever they want or that they don’t have some sort of food issue.

Honestly, ladies, I’ve yet to meet or coach a woman who has not struggled with body image or food issues. I have seen many girls binge, over-exercise, and deal with anorexia.

On my bucket list years ago was attending a Geneen Roth retreat. If you know her, ladies, she used to be on Oprah. She wrote the book Woman, Food, and God. And I always wanted to go to one of her retreats.

So I went to one of her retreats. It was amazing. And part of the retreat was we had these small group sessions. And this beautiful girl walked into mine. I mean, she was thin, I mean, just stunningly beautiful. And I thought, “Why is she even here?”

But love, when she started to speak, I was shocked. She thought she was overweight. She hated herself and her body. You know, loves, we never know what others are dealing with. We all have a human brain and a 50-50 life. We all have pain and struggle. That is the magic.

I believe to know that you can feel anything and take actions that serve you is really the magic, to learn how to manage our thoughts and feel feelings, it is the greatest work. I want to be exceptional. I want to be connected to this body I’m in. I want to learn how to watch my thoughts, feel my feelings, and take actions that serve me.

The first step is knowing what thoughts are driving your actions. And sometimes the thoughts are tricky. You know that lizard brain. They sound so good, but go deeper, love, they are driving you to overeat.

I learned that I could feel the feeling of deprivation. I mean, a feeling lasts about 90 seconds in our body if we allow it. Listen to episode number seven to learn how to feel your feelings.

I could also change my thought to create a different feeling, like, “I’m exceptional and I love eating food that fuels me.” Which then creates the feeling of love for me.

Okay, love, so here’s your transformational questions. Number one, what thoughts do you have right before you eat off-plan or overeat? Number two, what thoughts are causing you to feel deprivation? And number three, what if you feel the feeling of deprivation? What would change for you?

Ooh, so good, love. I mean, who wants to be normal? Not me. So, in next week’s episode, I’m going to talk about one of my favorite things; no, seriously, favorite. So don’t miss it.

Love, If you love this work and you want to take it deeper to lose weight for good, my signature program, Jumpstart, will be opening on January 1st – I’m so excited – for six days. To get early access to all of the information on it, register for the waitlist. You can register at bflycoaching.com/waitlist. Bye, loves.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come over to bflycoaching.com. That’s B – F – L – Y coaching dot com. See you next week!

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Ep #12: Diet Beliefs Busted

If you’ve been on any sort of weight loss journey, I can guarantee you’ve been faced with some diet beliefs that we’ve all been told at some point in our lives. Myths and beliefs about what you should be doing can seem helpful, but today, I want to show you how they’re actually keeping you stuck on the diet roller coaster for good.

Releasing these diet beliefs was crucial to me actually losing weight in the long-term, and I want the same results for you. I’m diving into eight myths today and busting them to show you that all they’re doing is causing you more suffering than necessary, and how you might actually be self-sabotaging your progress by holding onto them.

Join me this week, loves, as I crack eight diet beliefs – of which I’m sure there are hundreds of others out there – to give you a new perspective on how to start losing weight for good. Some of these will be hard to let go of, but I hope this work helps you see that you’ll be better off without them.

And here are this week’s transformational questions:

  1. What diet beliefs or myths do you have?
  2. What do you have to think to change your diet beliefs?

If you love this work and you want to take it even deeper to get off the diet roller coaster for good, you need to check out my signature program, Jumpstart. Doors will be opening on January 1st 2020 for six days only, so to get early access and more information, register here!


What You’ll Discover:

  • 8 diet beliefs that are keeping you stuck. 
  • Why you can lose weight without counting calories, points, or macros.
  • How diet beliefs can lead to self-sabotage.
  • Why I believe snacking is always an emotional event.
  • How listening to your body is key to losing weight. 
  • Why you have to learn to love your body now. 


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:


Full Episode Transcript:

You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen, episode number 12.

Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, Fortune 100 executive and Certified Life Coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Hello love. In today’s show, we are going to dive into all the diet beliefs that are keeping you stuck. I love this topic. It was so hard for me to reprogram my brain after years on the diet roller coaster, but it was key to me losing weight.

And as always, I will leave you with a couple of transformational questions so you can start taking action today. But first, I want to give a listener shout-out. This is where I’ll read a review of the podcast every week. This week’s listener shout-out is to AngelQueen.

The title of her review is, “I can relate. Shannan puts things into perspective. I find that I can relate to her experiences. I find myself accepting those experiences and starting to move forward. Thank you, Shannan.”

Thank you so much AngelQueen. I love these reviews. They really do inspire me. I love that you ladies are listening. If you love this show, please rate and review the show. I would just so appreciate it.

So ladies, I love the holidays. I just made a list and planned out all of the fun stuff that we’re going to do in December. Every year, I rent a big old 15-passenger van and we take my immediate family to go look at Christmas lights. It is the best. We sing Christmas carols, it’s so fun, and we go all over looking at lights.

I love this tradition. I just love the traditions of the holidays. I’ve loved over the last few years starting traditions that don’t center around food. I like finding cool things we can do as a family like games, service activities, and even things like making crafts together. Honestly, it is the best. I love those g-babies and they love and they’re in for whatever.

But I also like planning what I want to do and what I’ll say no to. This has been a work in progress for me. I used to say yes to everything. I wanted to show up for everything. But now, I guard my time. I look for the things that mean the most to me.

I used to do things I didn’t want to do and then love, I would build resentment for doing it. Loves, we do things out of obligation but what if you did the things you love? How would it feel to do the things that you love out of love? Not obligation.

We do things we don’t love and then we eat to buffer our feelings away. And now I love the things I do. I say no to the things I don’t want to do, and I don’t feel guilty about it. I choose what I do with my time, and loves, it is so powerful. So powerful to do the things that you love out of love.

So loves, let’s get into the diet beliefs. We have been programmed with all of these diet beliefs. We think they’re true. I see this come up with my Jumpstarters. They will be making progress and then an old diet belief will pop up. Then they start to sabotage. I did this too for so long.

I would be making progress and then an old belief, or I would hear someone talking about the new diet and my lizard brain would be like, “See? You’re not doing it right.” I think there are probably hundreds of diet beliefs and today I’m going to talk about eight of them. So let’s go through some of them.

Now loves, I’m not a doctor, so you should always consult your doctor. What I share with you is my research and my experience. So let’s get into it. Number one, and one of the hardest for me to let go of was that you have to count calories, points, macros, fat grams, carbs. I mean, every diet plan I had ever been on had some form of counting something.

I mean, if it was Weight Watchers, it was point. If it was Atkins, it was carbs. When it was the low-fat era, it was fat grams. It was always something. So dropping that diet belief took some time. I’ve lost my weight – hear me when I say this. I’ve lost my weight without counting any of it.

I’ve learned to pay attention to how food feels in my body. We have hormones that tell us when we’re full and when we’re hungry. But we become so disconnected that we just don’t feel any of them anymore.

Think about how our great-grandparents ate. They didn’t count calories. They didn’t count anything. They ate when they were hungry and they stopped when they were full. So ladies, listen to episode nine of you haven’t. It’s where I really go in-depth on this topic.

Okay, number two. Okay ladies, this one, my goodness. We’ve been told so many different things. So number two is that you have to eat three meals a day and a few snacks, and that you have to be eating all of the time because if you don’t, your metabolism will drop.

Loves, it’s one of the biggest misconceptions. The amount that your metabolism drops is so minute that it doesn’t affect you. Some people do intermittent fasting or different things like that, and they lose and maintain weight. Some people eat three meals a day with no snacks. Some people eat two meals a day with no snacks.

I’ve seen my clients do many different variations. And I believe that snacking is always an emotional event. Now, I know love, your lizard right now is like, what? But snacking is always an emotional event.

It is because I am trying to buffer some feeling that I don’t want to feel. I believe our body needs food breaks. Eating all the time never gives your body time to release the fat. Your body cannot release fat if your insulin levels are raised. So you have to give some time in your day where you’re not eating.

Now loves, I believe this is such important work. Do the research yourself. Test what works for you. My clients do many different things and they’re losing weight. And they have tested in their body what feels good for them. How does your body feel when you eat breakfast? Are you even hungry? Try giving a couple hour break during the day from eating. How does that feel in your body? Test different methods and see what works for you.

Okay, on to number three. Oh my goodness loves, the number three diet belief, I just need the right food plan and exercise plan. Loves, it has never been about the food. The reason we carry extra weight is because we eat food when our bodies does not need it for fuel.

And we overeat mostly because we’re trying to avoid or resist some feeling that we don’t want to feel. There is no magical food plan or pill. Trust me. I have tried all of it. You have to become the scientist of your own body. You have to learn how food feels in your body.

And let’s talk about exercise. We have been told that we must exercise to lose weight. Remember Biggest Loser? I mean, I watched that show and they exercise like, 10 hours a day. But loves, you can lose weight without exercising.

I used to use exercise as another way to beat myself up. I would start a diet and include exercise, and then I would start slipping and not exercising, and I would quit on the whole thing and beat myself up. I love walking. I do it because it’s the time where I think and it feels good. I never used it as a tool to lose weight.

I exercise for my brain and strength. I had to stop believing that exercise helped me lose weight. Because of being on the diet roller coaster for so long, it just kept me setting these unrealistic expectations and then beating myself up when I did not reach them.

Exercise and losing weight, when I separated the two and focused on my process, my four fundamentals, that’s what helped me lose the weight. I love exercise. I do Pilates too and I love it for the strength. But loves, it has nothing to do with the amount of weight that I carry on my body. And separating those two in my mind helped me lose the weight.

So number four, when I lose the weight, I will start loving my body, find a partner, get a better job, reach my dreams. Loves, this is such diet mentality. We think that when we get there, it will be better. But loves, we all have a 50/50 life, so losing weight does not change that.

To lose weight for good, we have to start loving ourselves. Our body. And working on our dreams now. We can’t wait for there because there is no there. Yes, I feel better in my body now, but I still have a lizard brain. I still have a 50/50 life. I had to go after my dreams and learn to love my body while I was losing weight.

If you don’t start changing your beliefs and mind, then when you lose the weight, all the diet beliefs and the things that kept you overweight will be there. And then love, eventually, you will sabotage and gain weight. I mean love, that is the diet roller coaster. And I had to learn this. I mean, this work, learning to start now with my dreams and loving my body, that was key to losing weight and now keeping it off.

Okay love, number five. An entire food group is bad. Carbs are bad, fat is bad, fruit is bad. I mean, every new diet fad wants you to cut out some food group. But love, I eat all the food groups. I learned what food fuels me and what doesn’t. I did this and I lost weight.

Loves, there are simple and complex carbs. There’s no good or bad. I eat potatoes, rice. I mean, I lost weight on them. There are three nutrients that you need to thrive. Carbs, protein, and fat. That’s the truth. Looking at food as fuel or non-fuel is the key. Loves, stop listening to everyone else and listen to your own body. It will never fail you.

Number six, oh my goodness loves, so many of us are part of the clean plate club. My dad, bless his heart, and I just love him so much, but he grew up so poor. I mean, very poor. They used to steal food to eat. So when I was growing up, it was not an option to not clean your plate. I learned to eat everything on my plate. This was another hard belief that I had to give up.

I just had my birthday and we had these little bundtinis. They’re just little miniature cakes. And when everyone left, there were about six left over. I knew I did not want them and my husband was not going to eat them, so I threw them away.

Now loves, I know that this can be so hard because we were just told never to waste food. But loves, I have learned that food will either be waste in your body or in the trash. You decide. Hear me say this again. It will be waste in your body or in the trash. It will sit on your hips or in the trash.

I prefer the trash. I know that we were all told that people are starving in Africa or the homeless, but loves, most of us are not packing our leftovers up and sending them off. For me, I donate time and money to help those organizations. So loves, turn in your membership card to the clean plate club.

Number seven. Oh my goodness. This one was hard for me too. Nighttime eating causes you to gain weight. It’s not the time of the day. It is what you are eating. For many of us, when we’re tired, we choose foods that do not fuel us. So many of you I know struggle with nighttime eating. I know. I did this for years.

It would be around 7pm, I was tired from the day and not wanting to feel all the stress from the day, so I wanted something sweet. A sugar cookie, an ice cream sandwich, whatever I had around. And because I was tired, I would eat more of it.

There are a lot of studies, and actually they found that it doesn’t matter what time of the day you eat. So all of you ladies who work a night shift, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that you are making your realistic plan, learning what food fuels you. Those are the keys. So love, bust the belief. It’s not the time of the day. It’s what you’re eating.

Okay, number eight. Oh my goodness, I hear this all the time. And I used to really believe this too. I just love food. And I hear this, I know right now you’re like, “But Shannan, I do. I just love it.” But loves, if you loved food, you would enjoy it.

You would slow down and choose foods that felt good in your body. You love the dopamine hit that you get. I hear this all the time, but it’s just a poisonous thought. We don’t truly love food. Even I’ll say it. I love something like chocolate cake, but loves, I don’t really love it. It’s just food. An object. It doesn’t love us back.

It’s actually caused us years of suffering and pain. Learning that food is just food, not comfort, not love, is a huge a-ha I had. I still enjoy some non-fuel food, but the more I slow down and taste it, the more I find that some of it I don’t even really like.

And when I was on the diet roller coaster, I was binging. I mean, honestly, I was overeating. I wasn’t even tasting it. I was consuming so much sugar that it lost the taste. Now loves, I will go weeks without eating a lot of sugar and then if I eat something like a banana or a Kind bar, it tastes really sweet to me.

That is the crazy part. We think we love it but really, we just want the dopamine hit and we want to avoid feeling our feelings. Food is not love. You are love, love.

So loves, eight diet beliefs. And I bet there are 50 more. So this is what you have to do. Identify all the diet myths, beliefs that you believe. And I’m sure as I was talking, you were like, no, that is not true, Shannan. I know. I know your lizard brain is going crazy.

But loves, the only thing that is true is that your body knows what’s good for it. You have to test what feels good in your body. What food your body can lose weight on. You have to pay attention and just test, test, test.

So the transformational questions. Number one, what diet beliefs or myths do you have? And number two, what do you have to think to change your diet beliefs? Loves, so good. We have been programmed with lots of diet beliefs. Find what they are for you and bust them. And then practice thinking something different.

If you love this work and you want to take it deeper to lose weight for good, my signature program, Jumpstart, will be opening on January 1st for six days, love. To get early access to all of the information on it, register for the waitlist. You can register at bflycoaching.com/waitlist.

Alright loves, talk to you next week.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come over to bflycoaching.com. That’s B – F – L – Y coaching dot com. See you next week!

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Ep #11: 2 Simple Tools for Weight Loss that We Overlook

Being on the diet roller coaster can lead us to look for some extreme solutions, right, ladies? Magical pills or shakes that seem to be the answer aren’t, and they just make us want to throw in the towel even more when they don’t work.

I’m sharing two tools that are often overlooked but absolutely crucial to losing weight for good with you today, and I want you to stay with me here. When you find out what they are, you might think, “I’ve heard this before, but does it really help?” When I hit plateaus in my diet, after eating on plan and eating foods that fuel me, I looked to these two tools and loves, the weight dropped even more.

Join me this week to learn more about these two really simple, free tools that will keep your weight loss journey going. They aren’t necessarily the sexiest things, but I can assure you, they are super effective and will give you other incredible benefits too, besides the weight loss.

And here are this week’s transformational questions:

  1. How much actual water are you getting a day and do you need to increase it?
  2. How is your sleep environment? Are you doing everything to ensure you’re getting a restful night of sleep?

If you love this work and you want to take it even deeper to get off the diet roller coaster for good, you need to check out my signature program, Jumpstart. Doors will be opening on January 1st 2020 for six days only, so to get early access and more information, register here!


What You’ll Discover:

  • The two tools that are key to helping you lose weight.
  • How not using these tools will keep you on the diet roller coaster.
  • How much water you should be drinking every day. 
  • Why being sleep deprived prevents you from losing weight.
  • How I ensure my environment is good for restful sleep. 


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:


Full Episode Transcript:

You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen, episode number 11.

Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, Fortune 100 executive and Certified Life Coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Hello love. I am just so excited to be with you again. I absolutely love these podcasts. It’s becoming one of my favorite things. I hope yours too. In today’s show, we are going to dive into two simple tools that are key to helping you lose weight. Sleep and water.

Now, this is my fourth bonus fundamental in my free mini course. Now, I know ladies, we have been told about these before. But today, I am going to dive in deep and give you some simple steps so that you can incorporate this into your plan. And as always, I’ll leave you with a couple of transformational questions so that you can start taking action today.

But of course, you know I love my ladies, so I want to give a listener shout-out. This is where every week, I will read a review of the podcast. This week’s listener shout-out is to BBJ1128.

She wrote, “I’m so grateful for finding you and these podcasts. I have been a part of the roller coaster for more years than I like to think about. Just as I was ready to throw in the towel, I found BFLY and these podcasts. I have been listening during my morning routine, my drive to and from work, and in the evening. You are the cheerleader I’ve needed. Thank you for sharing your stories and your teachings. I no longer feel alone in my thoughts. You rock.”

Thank you so much, BBJ1128. And ladies, if you love this show, please rate and review it. I would be so grateful. So as I’m recording this, my birthday was yesterday. I love my birthday and that it’s always around Thanksgiving. It’s one of my favorite weeks of the year.

I just love this time of year. I like all of the celebrations. Spending time with my family, and all of the different traditions we have. I remember when I was on the diet roller coaster, it would be all about the food for me. I was either on a restrictive diet or completely off. But to be honest love, usually during the holidays, I would be totally off. You know what I’m saying.

I would be eating anything I could get my hands on. And it’s so different for me now. I make my realistic plan and I eat mostly foods that fuel me. I like feeling good. I like eating foods that fuel me while still enjoying some of the things that don’t fuel me, like a birthday cake.

I, for sure, had birthday cake last Saturday night and I ate cheesecake yesterday. I had a couple bites, I slowed down, enjoyed them, and when I was satiated, I stopped. I mean love, that is the magic. There’s no more deprivation. There’s no more full-out binge. It’s just making my realistic plan and making it realistic.

Now, my daughter-in-law’s birthday is one day before mine and we always celebrate together. We had a party last Saturday night. We had so much fun and it was so great spending time together, loving up on those grandbabies. I mean, oh my goodness, they are just so cute.

My little Wyatt, he has a full man bun because his hair is so curly. My daughter-in-law completely wants to keep it growing and my son is like, let’s cut it. I’m kind of with my daughter-in-law. PS, don’t tell my son.

So this is the thing. It wasn’t about the food. That night, I wasn’t thinking about what I was going to eat. I thought about my family and being present with them. I thought about the conversation I was in and enjoying everyone.

Ladies, I am serious. It is such a mind change for me and it is possible to feel better and be more present in your life. This work is the greatest gift I’ve given myself. I mean, it is the greatest gift. I’m watching my jumpstarters going through this right now.

They’re seeing that losing the weight is a side benefit, but the mind shift is showing up in all areas of their lives. That is the magic of this work. So today’s topic, sleep and water, it is a magical fat burner that is free.

I know when I say sleep and water, your lizard brains automatically go to, “We’ve heard this before, this is really tough, does it really help?” But loves, it really does. And you know, it’s not sexy, like try my magical pill or a shake, but it’s way more effective.

Sleep and water, loves, they’re the key to losing weight. We’ve all heard it before. I’ve talked about it before. But loves, it’s the key to your life and wellbeing. If you’re dehydrated and sleep deprived, you will have more food cravings. Like, a lot more.

This is another thing that keeps you stuck on the diet roller coaster. If you do not have enough water, your body will send signals that you need it and most of the time, it comes in food cravings. You know those food cravings that you feel that you can’t control? Or sugar cravings?

Because if you’re dehydrated, you have no energy. We can actually live without food for a long time. I mean, like a really long time. There are people who go three weeks or months. Now, I don’t recommend that, but you can. We’re made actually to live without food.

But loves, we cannot even go three days without water. And water is necessary to losing weight. It helps our body release fat. It keeps us hydrated and gives us energy. Sometimes I think I’m hungry. I mean, I’ll have this thought or sensation in my body that I’m hungry, but if I drink a bottle of water, I realize I was just thirsty.

We have critical functions like our organs and brain that need water. And if we’re dehydrated, our body works on those. And it does not get to the lower level functions like burning fat. And you know ladies, we want our bodies to burn our fat.

Now, I know some of you don’t like it. When I say water, you’re like, “Shannan, I don’t want to drink it.” But honestly love, you just have to power through it. I remember not wanting to drink water and now, I crave water. I drink water like it’s going out of style.

But if you don’t like it, put it in a nice glass with ice. Put a lemon wedge or some fruit in it. Just drink it. Every morning when I wake up, I just down two bottles of water. That kind of gets me moving. Then I’ll have my coffee, and then I drink two more bottles of water.

It gets everything moving in my system and honestly, it gives me so much energy. Water is so important to weight loss. Doctors recommend – so I’ve heard many, many different things, but I like to think of drinking half of my weight in ounces per day of pure water.

Now, I love my coffee, and I love a Coke Zero every once in a while. But I know if I drink those, I have to up my water intake. Caffeine and alcohol, they actually dehydrate you. So if you drink caffeinated drinks or alcohol, you just need to up your water intake.

And ladies, this is the thing. You will know if you’re hydrated by the color of your urine. A pale yellow or clear. If it’s darker, you need more water. Isn’t it crazy how cool our bodies are and how we have these natural sensors and detection systems? I mean, it still amazes me.

This is part of becoming a scientist of your own body. And you can listen to more of that in episode nine around food for fuel. So loves, water. Drink it. I can’t tell you enough how important it is to losing weight.

So let’s move into sleep. Love, I know as ladies how sleep deprived we can become. We have families and children and some of you are new mothers. And I know that sleep feels like a distant dream. We wish we were dreaming.

But loves, you have to get it. They have done so many studies and if you’re sleep deprived, your body will not be able to lose weight. It will not function properly and your brain will not work right. Your body at night is repairing and rejuvenating itself, and it’s flushing out all the fat.

It’s also rebalancing all your hormones. A study done by the Center for Preventative Medicine at St. Luke’s International Hospital examine the relationship between sleep and weight in over 21,000 adults. And they were all over the age of 20.

The people who slept less than five hours each night over the course of the three-year study were more likely to gain weight and eventually become obese. There’s so many bad side effects to not getting enough sleep like gaining weight. You can’t think, you get sick, you forget stuff, and your skin suffers.

I’m going to put a link to a quick article I read on Healthline in the show notes. I love this article because it’s just quick and easy read and I want to put it there so you ladies can see it. But I have read so much research and articles on sleep. It is just critical for our body.

We have to make it a priority. I work on this all the time. I work on making my environment good for sleep. I even wear a sleep mask. I don’t drink caffeine at night and the phone, let’s talk about this, ladies. You have to put your phones away.

And if you wake up in the middle of the night, don’t pick it up. I have made that mistake a few times and it keeps me up. I also place a do not disturb on my phone. It’s automatic. Every night, it goes on. I also have a setting where at night, the blue light in my phone dims.

Ladies, I want to sleep. I make a commitment to get eight hours a night. It is crucial. Ask anyone in my life how I am about my sleep. When it is time for bed, I go. I mean, I am crazy about it. I’m an early riser, so I start getting ready for bed every night around 8pm. There are so many things you can do to get a better sleep.

Look at the environment. Do you have a great mattress? Do you have nice sheets? Is your room cool enough? Are you drinking caffeine too late? Are you turning off all the electronics? Loves, this is so important for weight loss.

When I was losing weight, I had hit a plateau in my weight loss. And I looked at what I was eating and felt good about it. I was making my realistic plan, I was eating on plan, I was eating mostly foods that fueled me. So the next thing I looked at was my sleep. I was not getting enough. And this is the crazy part. I decided okay, I’m going to get sleep, and I started to get sleep for a couple days in a row and magically, I dropped weight the next day.

Whenever I see my clients hit a plateau, we look at the data. And more often than not, sleep or water is the culprit. If you lack sleep or water, you will have increased food cravings. Loves, this will happen. If you’re tired, most of us will overeat. So ladies, check your sleep and water.

Sleep and water are my fourth bonus fundamental in my free mini course. You can go to bflycoaching.com to get the free course. And so the transformational questions today are, number one, how much actual water are you getting a day and do you need to increase it? Number two, how is your sleep environment? Are you doing everything to ensure you’re getting a restful night of sleep?

Sleep and water, loves, they are natural fat burners. They are key to losing weight and getting off the diet roller coaster for good. It has been so fun, loves, spending this time with you.

If you love this work and you want to take it deeper to lose weight for good and get off the diet roller coaster, my signature program, Jumpstart will be opening on January 1st 2020 for six days. To get early access to the information on it, register for the waitlist. You can register at bflycoaching.com/waitlist.

Alright loves, bye for now.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come over to bflycoaching.com. That’s B – F – L – Y coaching dot com. See you next week!

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