Facebook Live 8: Is Your Family Waiting?

I went through a period in my 20s where I was a single mom, raising my son alone, and I was gaining a lot of weight. As a result, my son started to gain weight too, and I felt so much guilt and shame around it. I was trying my best, but it was causing me so much pain. I was still trying every diet on the planet, I had not found my true calling, and I remember feeling so negative, which only led to eating even more.

I could not get control over my weight and I just couldn’t figure it out until I decided that I needed to show up for myself to show up for my son, and that I could keep commitments to myself and manage my mind. This is what turned my life around.

We sometimes think that our families are preventing or hindering our weight loss journey, but what I have learned is that they’re really just waiting for us to show them the way. So today, I ask all of you ladies to challenge the thoughts you might be holding onto about why you can’t do something. I know all the reasons because I had them too, but I want to remind you that just because you think it does not make it true.

I’m so happy to finally announce that the doors to The Transform Society are now open! The doors are closing this Saturday, so if you’re ready to do the work, get on the waitlist and join us!


What You’ll Discover:

  • How guilt and shame kept me on the diet roller coaster. 
  • The power of deciding to invest in yourself. 
  • Why you can embark on your own journey, despite the thoughts that might be holding you back.


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:

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Ep #44: Life-Changing Transformations with Dawn, Sharon, and Tammie

Life-Changing Transformations with Dawn, Sharon, and TammieLadies, I have a very special gift for you all today. For the first time ever on the podcast, I’ve got three beautiful guests on who are actually mentors for BFLY. I’m so excited to introduce you to Dawn, Sharon, and Tammie today, and they’re going to be giving us some insight into their weight loss journeys and tell you what has helped them the most.

These ladies have been exactly where you might be right now, and I know you’re going to find their stories completely relatable. They were on the diet roller coaster for decades, tried every fad diet out there, feeling completely low and hopeless. They joined The Transform Society and started using the tools I teach in there, and I’ve seen their transformation right before my eyes, not just in weight loss, but in the way they carry themselves too.

Join us today as I ask Dawn, Sharon, and Tammie about their weight loss transformation, their favorite tools that have provided them the biggest change, and what got them interested in joining The Transform Society. They’re also sharing amazing pieces of advice for any of you that might just be getting started, to give you the motivation and encouragement that you are on the right path.

Do you want to join Sharon, Dawn, and Tammy? The Transform Society is open until August 1st. If you’re ready to take this work to a whole new level, join The Transform Society. You can join by clicking here, and I can’t wait to see you there!


What You’ll Discover:

  • Dawn, Sharon, and Tammie’s weight loss journeys.
  • What made these ladies decide to get off the diet roller coaster for good. 
  • The key tools they’ve learned in this process that have helped them the most on their weight loss journeys. 
  • What got these ladies interested in joining The Transform Society. 
  • Dawn, Sharon, and Tammie’s one piece of advice for ladies who are just starting their weight loss transformation. 
  • How the community aspect of The Transform Society has helped these ladies. 


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:


Full Episode Transcript:

 

You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen, episode number 44. Today is a very special episode and the audio quality is a little different than our other episodes, but you are going to want to hear what these three beautiful ladies have to share with you.

Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, Fortune 100 executive and Certified Life Coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Shannan: Hello loves. Welcome back to the show. Today we have a very special show today. This is the first time ever that I’m going to have guests on the show. I have invited three amazing ladies to come and join us.

These ladies are members of The Transform Society and they’re also mentors for BFLY. They are just the most beautiful ladies and I have so much love for them. Ladies, you are in for a treat. These ladies are going to share their weight loss journeys with you and tell you what has helped them the most.

So, let me introduce the three ladies. So, we have Dawn Richards, Sharon Spawn, and Tammie Molnar. So first, we’re going to talk to Dawn and Dawn, hello.

Dawn: Hi Shannan.

Shannan: Hello, we’re so happy that you’re here with us today. So Dawn, tell us, if you could introduce yourself and just give a little background on your weight loss journey.

Dawn: So I’m Dawn and I am from Northern Utah. I am a mom and I’m also a math teacher at our local high school, and I’ve spent all day today writing a math book, so it’s disgusting. So, I’ve been with Shannan for almost a year now. Super glad I found her. But I’ve always had problems, I’ve always kind of been on the heavier side my whole life.

And as a kid, I went to Weight Watchers. Before I was 12, I was in Weight Watchers three times, and I also was in a hospital program to help kids lose weight. And they gave you two dollars every time you lost a pound.

Shannan: Oh no.

Dawn: When I got a little bit older, I got into athletics and I lost quite a bit of weight, and I was quite slender probably until I was 25. And then I started having babies and I did pretty good. And then my third child, when he was born, he passed away. And I started struggling with my weight again.

I gained lots of weight and I had spurts where I would take it off and put it on and take it off and put it on. I went to Weight Watchers three more times. I did the Atkins diet, many fad diets. I lost and gained hundreds of pounds.

Shannan: I tell you, I think all the ladies can really understand that. And I know about your son and I just want to say again, I know what a loss that was to you. I want to hug you right now. I have so much love for you and sorry that that happened to you.

You know Dawn, I want to ask you a question about being on the diet roller coaster. And when you first found me, where were you at at that moment?

Dawn: I was not dieting anymore. I actually had completely sworn off dieting. I wasn’t necessarily in an overeating state all the time eating, but I was just like, you know what, I’m not going to diet anymore. I’m just going to stop when I’m full and if I want a treat, I want a treat, but I was not dieting anymore. There was no more dieting.

Shannan: And what do you think made you decide that you were just done with it?

Dawn: I had just thought, you know what, this is just how I am. And this is what I am and I’m fine with it. And I really wasn’t, that wasn’t the truth, and so I think I just didn’t – I didn’t know how. I’d got to that point where I just, I didn’t know how.

Shannan: Yeah. And so, you took a chance on BFLY and me and what made you decide that you were intrigued or even interested in coming into The Society?

Dawn: One thing is that when you talk, you talk with such passion and love. And you’re vulnerable, and you will throw it all out there, and I love that part. I love that you’ve been there. I love that you’ll tell us how much you love us and that you want us to succeed. And you have such passion for each one of our journeys. You remember the little things about us like that I love fruit snacks.

You remember those things, and just having that – you’re just so genuine about weight loss. You truly want us to succeed. You truly want us to do our work and get off the diet roller coaster.

Shannan: And thank you so much Dawn, I mean, that was so sweet. What are really kind of the one or two key things that you’ve learned in this process over the last almost year that has really helped you?

Dawn: I’ve learned to watch my thoughts. My thoughts create my emotions, and the emotions cause actions. So that means that if my thought is “you’re fat,” I’m sad, and I don’t want to feel that, and so I go and eat. And knowing that process just there has really helped me and knowing that my brain doesn’t always tell the truth. It lies to me sometimes.

Shannan: Yeah. Isn’t that the most – when I was learning this work myself, I have to say that it was one of the biggest a-ha moments I had was when I realized that just because I have a thought doesn’t make it true. I remember learning that like, what? Back up. Hold on one second.

Because it was just so – I don’t know, I had always believed all the things that went through my head. And I was my worst critic. And so many times I was lying to myself. And so for sure, I understand that.

Dawn: It’s made a huge difference.

Shannan: Anything else?

Dawn: Other things that I’ve learned, some other things too is that writing my things down and being in my – not my primitive brain but my brain that does the work – what’s that brain called?

Shannan: Prefrontal, yeah.

Dawn: Yes, in my prefrontal brain. That’s where you are so powerful is in your prefrontal brain. If you can do the planning ahead of time and you can be in that part of your brain, it’s great. And there’s all these tools out there to help me. I don’t have to be on a diet plan. That’s the best part. And I’m learning to love my body, learning to love who I am. That’s the most incredible thing. I told my husband last night, I’m like, I think I have the coolest body. He’s like, you feeling okay?

Shannan: Isn’t it cool when you start looking at your body with love? It’s the best.

Dawn: And feeding it with love. That’s love to my body. That’s what – that’s love.

Shannan: I love that so much, Dawn. So we have a lot of ladies that are listening right now and they’re where you were almost a year ago, and what advice would you give one of our loves out there who are just starting on her weight loss transformation?

Dawn: The one thing I would do is I would say try everything. Do every worksheet, give your full effort, and when you get stuck, say something. We’re all here to help you. Say I’m stuck, I don’t get this, I don’t know what’s going on. Be vulnerable and realize that we are all in the same place with you, and you’re going to – so many things are going to change. It’s life-changing.

Like that means your whole life. I actually have a relationship with my sister and my mom. This is incredible. I never thought in a million years that I would have a relationship with them and that I could say I love them and that you’re worth your work. You are worth it.

Shannan: Dawn, I love that so much. So, for all you ladies who are listening who are not in The Transform Society, we kind of have a little bit of an inside joke and I’ll tell you what it is. And the joke is I bring you in saying let’s lose some weight, and then you actually learn to love yourself, you change your relationships, and the weight loss is just kind of secondary.

And not that you don’t lose weight and not that, but you realize that you actually can have this beautiful, amazing life that you create and you can become your best self. And then once you start loving yourself, then the weight just starts coming off. How much weight have you lost, Dawn?

Dawn: As of this morning, I’ve lost 35.5 pounds. That 0.5 is important.

Shannan: Yes, it is.

Dawn: Every little bit counts.

Shannan: Every little bit counts. I love it Dawn.

Dawn: You know, it’s been work, but it’s been such worthwhile work. I’ve never cared this much about myself in my whole life. I’ve never put this much effort into myself and I just can’t believe I didn’t start a long time ago. But I needed to get to that point where I decided that I was worth looking on the inside.

Shannan: I love that so much, Dawn. I love Dawn and Dawn is a mentor. And you know, all three of these ladies are mentors and they are there to help. I know my listeners are listening, and I know how it is to feel hopeless. And you know, why I wanted to bring these three ladies on is so that you can see that there is hope and that you can get off the diet roller coaster and it’s possible. Thank you so much Dawn.

Dawn: Thank you.

Shannan: Okay, we are going to move right on to Sharon. Hello Sharon.

Sharon: Hi Shannan. How are you?

Shannan: Good. How are you doing love?

Sharon: Good.

Shannan: Tell us a little bit, tell all the ladies out there listening, tell us a little bit about yourself, Sharon.

Sharon: Okay. I’m Sharon Spawn. I’m from Levittown, Pennsylvania. I’m a former pre-school teacher and a mom of three amazing boys.

Shannan: I know. You have twins, right?

Sharon: Yes. Twin boys. They’re all amazing.

Shannan: I know. So Sharon, tell me just kind of your weight loss journey and I would say your weight journey. Tell us a little bit about that.

Sharon: I always was the chunky kid. From the time I was born, I was a chunky baby and all the way through high school I was on the diet roller coaster, up and down. I tried every fad diet there was for 40 years. And I would gain some, lose some, and then I’d try whatever came out next. And you just get to a point where you didn’t know what to do.

Shannan: Yeah, I know all the ladies listening, we’ve all been there, right? I was with you. I was almost 38 years on the diet roller coaster of just gaining weight, losing weight, trying everything out there. No, for sure.

Sharon: I felt like a yo-yo. I bounced up and down, up and down, up and down the weight scale. And I’m shocked that I didn’t break it.

Shannan: You just do start to feel, again, back to that word, hopeless. You do start to feel like am I ever going to figure this out? Am I ever going to find something? And there’s just so much stuff out there and you’re trying all these different things, and most of it are these magical food plans or exercise plans.

And I think one of the things that with all of you ladies, that you’re learning, is that the magic has always been inside of you. It’s all inside of your brain and it’s not in this kind of outside environment. And so tell me, I remember you because I remember your very first email to me. And you kind of had told me your story and so tell me when you very first found me, what intrigued you about BFLY Coaching and why did you think this was it or why you were even ready?

Sharon: Actually, well, I went to your first – I joined, I went to one of your Lives. And I’m listening and I was like, wow, I can do this. There isn’t a magic pill, there’s no magic, there’s no food plan, I’m not restricted, I can make my own choices. And so I felt that this is for me. This is – I’m going to give it a shot. Give me one more chance and see how it goes.

Shannan: Yeah. And tell us, you joined The Society, Sharon was the first one actually who signed up. She was – Sharon has come to, I would say – I don’t think you’ve missed but one thing ever. I mean, you have shown up. So tell us Sharon, what are kind of the one or two things that really you use and that have really changed everything for you?

Sharon: Well, what really changed for me is doing the realistic plan and reflection work. Planning your meals out really helps. You don’t have to stand there with the cupboard door open or the refrigerator door open saying, what am I eating today?

And when you planned it out and plan ahead, it takes the drama out of it. And when I sit down and I do my reflection work in the morning and I do it before I go to bed at night and I go through my thoughts and it helps me discover more about myself. Why I was an overeater, why things didn’t work.

Shannan: Yeah. That’s so good, Sharon. Again, we always think that it’s outside of us. And when we start exploring how we’re thinking, how it’s making us feel, why we’re overeating, and then we get these tools that help us. So, things like allowing urges and using the butterfly jar and different techniques throughout the program that really help us, right?

And I was thinking about you and thinking about community and support. Tell the ladies your experience when it comes to all the other ladies that are in The Transform Society.

Sharon: Oh, these beautiful ladies, they are so loving and supportive. They listen. They will help you if you have any sort of problem, you’re struggling, they’re always out there to help you. They’ve been where you are. Everybody’s working together so you’re not alone. They become your best friends. They’re your family. And that is so amazing. It just warms my heart. These women, I just love them to pieces. I could hug them all.

Shannan: I know, right? I love them too. We do have a lot of love happen in The Society, The Transform Society for sure. So okay, tell all the ladies how much weight you lost, Sharon.

Sharon: I’m at 91 pounds.

Shannan: Holy moly, 91 pounds. That is amazing. I remember when you – Sharon sent me her before picture way back when, when she first started emailing me. And boy, the thing I’ve seen her after pictures, and you know what I see the most Sharon is just – it’s not even the weight loss. It’s the way that you smile. It’s the way that you light up. And tell us all how you’re feeling right now.

Sharon: Oh, I’m so over the moon. I love myself. I love every inch of me with the batwing arms to the stretch marks to everything. Even though I got a little bit of a belly, I love that too. It’s who I am. I embrace it with all the love.

Shannan: I love that so much. So, we have a lot of ladies listening so what advice would you give one of the ladies who are just starting out in her weight loss transformation?

Sharon: What I would tell them is be patient with yourself. Believe in yourself because you are worth it. And every pound you lose is just a stepping stone to a success and also to whatever goals you could reach. Anything is possible.

Shannan: I love that. It’s one of my favorite things to say. I write that a lot in my reflection work. Anything is possible. It does give you such a feeling of almost like your superpower, right?

Sharon: Oh yes. I feel like I’m Superwoman.

Shannan: I love it. Sharon, so much love for you. Thank you so much. So, I am so excited because we are going to now go to Tammie Molnar. Tammie, how are you?

Tammie: I’m good, how are you Shannan?

Shannan: So good. I am so happy that you are here and talking to all of the ladies today. So tell us a little bit about yourself.

Tammie: Well, I’m Tammie. I’m from Ohio. I have two beautiful kids and it’s been almost a year now since I found BFLY.

Shannan: Love it. And tell us just a little bit about kind of your weight journey.

Tammie: Well, I’ve been overweight most of my adult life, starting at about age 21, I think. I’ve slowly gained weight over the years and especially with each of my two pregnancies, especially my second one. And I’ve just never been able to get the weight off.

I’ve tried all the magic pills, potions, fad diets, pretty much everything except Weight Watchers and weight loss surgery. And I just haven’t been able to get below that 200 mark in years, and it’s just been so frustrating. And I ended up giving up on myself.

Shannan: And tell me, how did it feel giving up on yourself and what was happening with you at the time?

Tammie: I just felt like I wasn’t worth the effort anymore and I didn’t like myself so I figured no one else would like me, so I didn’t even try.

Shannan: I mean, we love you. We think you’re amazing. So you decided to join BFLY and The Society, and what made you decide that this was the program that you were going to try?

Tammie: I wasn’t even really looking for a program at the time, because like I said, I had given up on myself. I was probably at the lowest point I ever was in my life. And I was just on Facebook and I think an ad popped up for you or something about BFLY popped up anyway.

And I clicked on it out of curiosity and was scrolling through your Facebook page, looking at some of your old videos. And then I went to your first Facebook Live, and I’ve been hooked ever since.

Shannan: I love that.

Tammie: And I knew this was the program for me.

Shannan: Yeah. And when you were thinking back to back then, what was one of the things that you really thought was different?

Tammie: You taught that everything revolved around our own thoughts, and that just kind of changed everything for me. You didn’t have an exercise plan or a food plan that we had to follow and that we had to restrict. It was more we had to change our own mindset and become a watcher of our own thoughts.

Shannan: It’s so good, Tammie. And okay, we’re waiting, tell us how much you’ve lost and tell us a little bit about how you think of yourself today.

Tammie: So far, I’ve lost 25 pounds. And while sometimes I do get a little frustrated that it’s not happening faster, I remind myself that I didn’t gain it overnight, so I’m not going to lose it overnight. And sometimes I’ll call myself the turtle that even though it might be a slow progress, I’m still going to win this race. And I’m so much more confident in myself. I love myself again. A year ago, I could not say that.

Shannan: Yeah. How does that feel, Tammie? To love yourself again.

Tammie: Oh, it feels wonderful. Before, I was always doubting anything. Not even about my weight, but whether it was relationships or with my job, or just something kind of mundane in general. Now I just have so much more confidence about anything.

Shannan: Yeah. Tell all the listeners what you did this past weekend for the first time ever.

Tammie: I went jet skiing.

Shannan: Love it.

Tammie: Which I didn’t drive it, but still, I had never been on one before.

Shannan: I love every second because you’re gaining – all three of you ladies, I’ve watched you just honestly transform in front of my eyes. And not just the weight, but how you’re confident, how you feel about yourselves, how you are now leading in The Society and you’re leading study halls and you are helping all the other ladies. And boy, that is just amazing. And Tammie, is there anything else you would want to – what’s your favorite tool that I teach? I know it’s hard to pick.

Tammie: Probably the realistic plan. Because I don’t have to think about what I’m going to eat. Even if I know I’m going somewhere and I don’t know what they’re serving, I can still just say I’m going to have a protein, a carb, a veggie. And if I decide I want a dessert, I’ll put a dessert down on the plan.

I won’t have any mind drama around eating the brownie if I want a brownie. And it just makes it so much easier and if I see something that’s not on my plan, I’ll just go, oh, that’s not on my plan, I can put that on for next time.

Shannan: Yeah, isn’t that the best part? I love the realistic plan. I mean, still to this day, I make a realistic plan every day. And I just love the freedom in it and you had said this. You said the freedom from the obsession, right? Because on diets, I was always thinking about food, thinking about my next meal, thinking about should I eat this, should I not eat this.

And it was just all of this mind chatter. And for me too, one of my favorite tools is the realistic plan. And I love that I get to just make a plan and then if I want a brownie or a cupcake or whatever it is, I just put it on my plan. And you said this, there’s no drama. I can eat it if I want it, and when I’m full I stop. And it is such freedom.

And I think for all of us, we’ve been on the diet roller coaster and it always felt like chains. We were just always either binging and totally overeating, or on this very restrictive. And I think what I’ve learned that’s helped me in my weight loss and what I’m teaching all of you is that there is a way to eat that you can always eat that way.

And it doesn’t mean cutting out a food group or cutting out the favorite things that you like. And you get to decide what you want to eat, which I think is just so powerful. So Tammie, what advice would you give a new lady starting out in her weight loss transformation?

Tammie: The main thing I would say is to give yourself grace and to just keep going and stay committed to yourself. You won’t regret it. You’ll have plenty of mistakes and fails, but that’s okay. It’s even great. It’s how you keep learning. I’ve made tons of mistakes and had lots of fails, but I’ve learned from each one and it’s made me a better person for it.

Shannan: I love that.

Tammie: I was just going to say, and I don’t regret any of it. And your program is worth every penny I’ve spent on it.

Shannan: Tammie, that’s so sweet. You know Tammie, I love the word grace. It’s one of my favorite words because I think when I was on the diet roller coaster, and I think when ladies first come to me, we’re in this cycle of just beating ourselves up nonstop, all the time. Sometimes where we don’t even recognize that we’re doing it all the time.

And part of learning this process is really learning how to have grace with yourself and how to have challenges and failures and still then take the next best action, and there’s no throwing it all to the wind. And it’s another one of my favorite parts. I love the word grace. I’m so happy that you feel the same way.

Well ladies, it has been truly a gift to all of the ladies. I am just so thankful that you came on the podcast today. And you know, if you want to see Dawn, Tammie, and Sharon, they are in The Transform Society. But they also hang out in our Weight Loss for Successful Women Facebook group, so you can see them there.

If you comment, these ladies are going to support you and they can help you for sure. So, thank you ladies so much. I have so much love for you. And all the listeners out there, I’ll see you next week. Bye loves.

Do you want to join Sharon, Dawn, and Tammie? The Transform Society is open until August 1st. If you’re ready to take this work to a whole new level, join Transform Society. You can join at BFLYCoaching.com/join. Can’t wait to see you in there, love. Bye love.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come over to bflycoaching.com. That’s B – F – L – Y coaching dot com. See you next week!

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Facebook Live 7: 3 Simple Steps to Stop Gaining Weight

I was on the diet roller coaster for decades, and weight loss was something I just thought I was never going to be able to overcome. I believed it was always going to be my struggle. I tried every diet, pill, and potion out there until I learned there was a different way, and this is what I teach all my ladies in The Transform Society.

With the world changing and new stresses we’ve all had to adapt to, so many people over the last few months have either gained weight or have had a hard time kickstarting their weight loss transformation. If you ladies have been struggling lately, maybe eating more than you normally would and feeling an enormous amount of stress, uncertainty, and fear, I want you to know that there’s a different solution than eating.

Join me today as I give you three simple tips that will help you turn your weight loss journey around. Even with the presence of COVID, my ladies in The Transform Society have actually lost substantial amounts of weight, and it’s because they’ve learned how to show up for themselves, plan, and get support from a community of women, so I hope to see you in there!

I’m so happy to finally announce that we are opening the doors to The Transform Society on July 28th! We’re going to open for only five days, so if you’re ready to do the work, get on the waitlist and join us!


What You’ll Discover:

  • How you can lose weight in a way that feels like love and is sustainable. 
  • 3 simple tips to help you turn your weight loss journey around. 
  • Why we have a hard time with overeating. 
  • What to do instead of “last supper-ing” your meals. 
  • The key to living your best life. 


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:

Enjoy the Show?

Ep #43: Questions I Get from My Ladies

Questions I Get from My Ladies

We have a first on the podcast today. I get so many questions from listeners and the ladies in my programs, so today we’re going to do a Q&A so you can get the answers to some of the most commonly asked questions about the work I share.

I’m so excited for today’s episode. Whether you’re struggling to stick with your realistic plan, finding the time to look after yourself with work and a busy family life, or even if you don’t even know where to start on your weight loss journey, this episode is for you, my love.

Tune in this week to discover the answers to some of the questions I receive on a regular basis. You’re not alone in this work, and if you are finding yourself stuck, eating off-plan, or lacking motivation, you’re not the only one, and I have the answers for you today.

And here are this week’s transformational questions:

  1. What can you do for yourself today? How can you put your oxygen mask on first?
  2. When you make your realistic plan, is it idealistic or realistic?
  3. What if you knew that you were never going to have the motivation? What feeling could still help you reach your goals?

The Transform Society is opening for 5 days only on July 28th! If you want to take this work deeper, a community to help and support you, and you’re ready to get off the diet roller coaster, then sign up for the waitlist. You will get all the information, the free trainings, and I will mail you a brochure right to your home with all of the information! 


What You’ll Discover:

  • What you need to know if you’re wondering where to start with this work.
  • How we help ladies in The Transform Society start losing weight by meeting them where they are.
  • Why you owe it to yourself and your family to dedicate some time to yourself to do this work.
  • What stops so many ladies from sticking to their realistic plan.
  • Why you don’t need to feel the motivation before you start taking action to achieve a goal.


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:


Full Episode Transcript:

You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen, episode number 43.

Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, Fortune 100 executive and Certified Life Coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Hello, loves. Welcome back to the show. So excited again to be back with you ladies today. I’m going to do something that I have never done on the show. So, wait for it.

But, as always, before we get into the show, I want to give a listener shoutout to P. She wrote, “Thank you. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, no pun intended. I too have been a victim of restrictive diets for the majority of my life and I’m very excited to try this with my new sisterhood of friends.”

Thank you so much, P. It was, again, such a beautiful review. It means a lot to me that you love this and you’re listening. Thank you to all of the ladies who have taken the time to leave a review. I just appreciate it more than you know.

So, loves, still in quarantine. Seriously, I was thinking about how crazy this year has been and mostly I’ve tried to really find the good. I mean, I’m a coach. This is what I do. So, I’m looking at all the areas that I’m learning and growing, how I have more time because I’m not traveling. But some days, love, I just really miss being around people. You know, like groups of people.

My husband and I would travel a lot. Every month, a couple times a month at least. So, we’ve been in the house a lot. So, ladies, I bought this date subscription box. So, we can have a date at home.

We’ve tried it. We’ve received two months so far. They are pretty creative with the games. So, you kind of get this game plus you get, you know, where you can make something together. And, you know, they give you the dry ingredients for this kind of dessert.

And we actually have not done the dessert part because it’s not that we don’t like dessert. We love dessert, but it’s actually not been things that we like. So, we have done the games and they’re pretty fun actually. We’ll keep it for a bit and see wat comes in our third box. But honestly, love, I just like having fun with my husband and he’s the best part of it for sure.

So, today, ladies, are you excited? We are going to do questions and answers. I get tons of questions and today, I want to take some time to answer them.

One of the questions that I get a lot in lots of different ways is, “Where do I begin? How do I start? I keep wanting to start but I keep putting it off. I keep last-supper-ing it.”

I see this a lot with ladies. And I did this myself for a long time. They start in The Transform Society or even with my free course. What happens is they start thinking about all the restriction, all the diets they’ve been on, and then they start having their last supper. And they keep doing it over and over again.

Love, I did this for so long. There are really two things at play here. One is this fear of failure, wanting to be perfect. And the second reason is not wanting to feel the feeling of restriction. So, let’s dive into number one.

So, the fear of failure and wanting to be perfect is one of the top reasons I find that we stay on the diet roller coaster. We want to eat perfectly. We want the perfect body. You know, the one of the 18-year-old on the magazine. And we promise ourselves that if we’re just perfect, we can lose all of our weight in three months.

So, we place all of these expectations of perfectionism, and then, love, we feel overwhelmed by it. And when we feel overwhelmed, we do nothing. We just keep putting it off. But really, love, we’re putting off our dreams. We’re outing off us.

Now, the second piece is not wanting to feel restriction. This comes from a long diet history of, you know, quote unquote clean diets or calorie restriction or getting rid of an entire food group. When ladies join the Transform Society, we start them in stage one of a four-stage process.

And stage one is the how. The how to lose weight. They start by doing simple consistent steps so they don’t start shutting down, feeling overwhelmed. And if they start to, I teach them a technique that starts to help them get quick successes, so they can start to feel proud instead of overwhelmed.

I also teach a process where I meet the ladies where they’re at. If you’re eating two Big Macs and fries every day, you cannot go to chicken and salad. I teach you to up-level. And by up-leveling, you’re not making major shifts. It’s just one small shift at a time.

You can create your realistic plan, choose the food that you like, and you don’t have to cut out any food groups. Dieting is not the way, love. If it was, there would not be a billion-dollar industry.

Another question I get is, “I’m so busy, I cannot find the time to write my realistic plan, get my sleep in. I’m honestly exhausted.” I see this with so many women. It comes back to this need to take care of everyone, to put everyone’s needs above their own.

I do believe that, as women, we have to put our oxygen mask on first. We have to take care of ourselves. That’s how we lead by example. If you show your family that you come last, then when they have families, they will believe that they should come last.

Hear me on this, ladies, you teach through your example. Love, you cannot not find the time for yourself. The crazy part is, we say we don’t have the time. But how often are you watching Netflix, scrolling through social media?

Really look at where you’re spending your time. My ladies spend about 10 to 15 minutes a day doing their realistic plan and reflection work. And then they spend about another hour or two a week coming to the coaching calls or doing the coursework or spending time with their ladies in the accountability groups.

They choose what works for them. Love, your lizard brain will always tell you that you don’t have the time, or to put it off until later. Know that those thoughts will be there, then just do it anyways. You are worth the time, love. This, I know for sure.

Another question I get is, “I’m making my realistic plan, but I keep eating off of it.” I get this question a lot. If you don’t know what the realistic plan is, go to bflycoaching.com/6. It’s actually episode number six in the podcast.

So, loves, first question I always ask my ladies is, is your plan realistic? Or is it just another salad and chicken diet plan? You must meet yourself where you’re at.

One of my ladies in The Transform Society said, “Is it idealistic or realistic?” I thought it was so good. We go deep into planning in the society and I give a few tools. So, for my ladies in the society, use the B-Fly Gage. It’s the best way to make your realistic plan.

If you’re not in the society, really look at your plan and ask, is this idealistic or realistic? Also, if you’ve made your plan and it’s realistic but suddenly the cookies in the pantry are calling your name, maybe you out two on your plan, but now you’re on your fourth one.

Ask yourself this question; what am I not wanting to feel right now? It’s such a great question to ask to disrupt the overeat. Once you’ve answered it, then take the next best action. You can stop in the middle of an overeat.

You don’t have to say forget it and throw everything to the wind, throw the whole day out, scrap everything and eat everything in the pantry. You don’t have to do that. You just say, “What am I not wanting to feel?” And then, take the next best action. You’ve got this, love.

Another question I get a lot – yes, ladies, a lot – is, “I just can’t find the motivation or willpower.” Love, this is one of the biggest miss and self-sabotaging thoughts. Believing that we need motivation to do something.

I teach a lot on the brain. I actually have a whole module on the brain inside my Transform Weight Loss course. I love learning about it. And we have this automatic brain and a primitive part of our brain too. These two parts are in control 90% to 95% of your day. Yes, love, 90% to 95% of your day.

If you have the habit of overeating, then your automatic brain will continue until you use your prefrontal cortex to plan and make a different decision. Your prefrontal cortex is the thinking brain. It does not come from motivation or willpower.

I expect that my thoughts will always say, “Don’t do it. Eat this. Eat off-plan, it won’t hurt.” And when you start expecting it, then you can take a different action. Hear me on this, ladies. Every goal, every one I’ve ever achieved, I mostly did not have the motivation for.

Motivation is a feeling. It lasts about 90 seconds. Achieving any goal is small consistent actions and failures. Love, just know that you won’t have the motivation, and do it anyways. That is how you become unstoppable.

That is what my ladies are becoming: unstoppable. And they’re transforming before my very eyes. I am so excited about next week’s show, love. We have a never before on the podcast event again. Like, so good.

So, I always like to leave you with a few transformational questions, so here they are. Number one, what can you do for yourself today? How can you put your oxygen mask on first? Number two, when you make your realistic plan, is it idealistic or realistic? And number three, what if you knew that you were never going to have the motivation? What feeling could still help you reach your goals? So good, my loves.

Love, if you are wanting to take this work deeper and you love this work, The Transform Society is opening in July. If you’re ready to get off the diet roller coaster and you want a community of women to help and support you, then sign up for the waitlist. You will get all of the information on when it opens, the free trainings, and a brochure mailed right to your home. You can get it at bflycoaching.com/waitlist. Bye for now, love.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come over to bflycoaching.com. That’s B – F – L – Y coaching dot com. See you next week!

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Facebook Live 6: Do You Feel Lonely in Weight Loss?

I want to ask you all a question today: have you ever felt lonely about weight loss? Have you ever felt like your friends and family just didn’t understand what you were going through? Loves, I have been there. I have felt the loneliness of losing weight without support and it’s hard. 

When we don’t have a group of women around us that know what we’re going through, that know the shame and guilt we feel, the journey of losing weight can feel very isolating. And that loneliness triggers shame and guilt which you end up pushing down with candy bars. At least, that’s what I did. 

Today, I’m sharing a story of a time I felt incredibly lonely on my weight loss journey and why I desperately needed an understanding community who had been there. My ladies in The Transform Society can tell you that support and community are a big part of my programs and one of the reasons I believe in them whole-heartedly. Because I believe in you, loves, and when you feel that support, you will believe in yourself too.

I’m so happy to finally announce that we are opening the doors to The Transform Society on July 28th! We’re going to open for only five days, so if you’re ready to do the work, get on the waitlist and join us!


What You’ll Discover:

  • My story of being the heaviest girl in the room and feeling lonely. 
  • The drama this loneliness causes in our heads. 
  • How loneliness can cause shame and guilt.
  • What happens when you have a supportive group of women who get it.
  • That you aren’t alone on your journey and there is a community here to support you.


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:

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Ep #42: Old Diet Rules That Are Slowing Your Weight Loss

Old Diet Rules That Are Slowing Your Weight Loss

What if all of our diet beliefs and rules were wrong? And what if we could create our own rules based on testing our own bodies? These are the questions I teach my ladies to consider; to challenge every rule and belief that has been taught to us by the diet industry.

Whether it’s not eating at night or eliminating carbs, ladies, you may be surprised to hear that these are just myths when it comes to weight loss. We’ve created a belief that carbs are bad, or that we have to eat breakfast to curb hunger later in the day, and then create rules for ourselves around this that don’t serve us. I rarely eat breakfast and I eat carbs, and so do my ladies in The Transform Society, and we’ve all lost weight.

Join me today as I encourage you to become the scientist of your own body. I urge you to stop taking on rules that the diet industry or society at large has told you are crucial for weight loss, and start asking questions to dig into what you want to believe and implement in your own life.

And here are this week’s transformational questions:

  1. What are your diet rules?
  2. Which ones do you want to stop believing?  

If you love this work and you want to go deeper, take my free mini-course. Click here for more information.

The Transform Society is opening for 5 days only on July 28th! If you want to take this work deeper, a community to help and support you, and you’re ready to get off the diet roller coaster, then sign up for the waitlist. You will get all the information, the free trainings, and I will mail you a brochure right to your home with all of the information! 


What You’ll Discover:

  • How diet rules slow your transformation.
  • Why I encourage my ladies to create their own rules. 
  • How my beliefs turned into the rules that I created for myself. 


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:


Full Episode Transcript:

You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen, episode number 42.

Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, Fortune 100 executive and Certified Life Coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Hello loves. Welcome back to the show. Ladies, so excited to be with you today. We’re going to talk about diet rules and how they really slow your transformation. But before we get into the show, I want to give a listener shout-out to Rebecca Hardy.

She wrote, “You are such an inspiration for me. This podcast has made things so much easier for me. Even though reflection work is the hardest for me, listening to this reminds me not to beat myself up and to see the success that I’ve had. Thank you.”

Thank you so much, Rebecca. Again, another really thoughtful review. Ladies, it means so much to me when you leave these reviews. If you get the time, if you could leave a review, I would really appreciate it.

So, I was putting away groceries the other day and I noticed that I was looking at labels. I started counting calories in my head and I was like, what? Honestly love, it was just old habits of counting calories that still float around in my head.

Even though I have been on this journey for years and years, I counted calories for so long. I had looked at labels to see fat grams, carbs, sugar content. I did this the majority of my life. I’ve worked on my own diet beliefs and changing them has helped me to get off the roller coaster.

So love, I love definitions. So I want to give you a couple definitions. So the word belief is defined as an acceptance that a statement is true or that something exists. I believed for so long that I could only have a limited number of calories in a day that it has become an engrained belief.

But also, a rule. A rule, by definition, is a set of explicit or understood regulations or principles governing conduct within a particular activity or sphere. So I had accepted that if I ate too many calories, that was the belief, and then I made it a rule.

It governed me for a long time. So we have these rules around dieting. We have these long histories of dieting. We have lots of rules and we believe them. I had the rule around limiting my calories for so long that it still circles in my head.

I have them floating around like meals can only be 300-400 calories for lunch, or you can only have so many calories a day. The difference for me now and for my ladies is that we’ve challenged the belief. I no longer believe that calories are the sole contributor to weight gain or loss.

Our bodies are complex, and we have a few hormones that I believe have a higher contribution to weight gain or loss than calories. I teach all about it in The Society. There are so many “diet rules” like you must eat breakfast. I was reading a very famous fitness expert, her blog the other day, and she still states it.

She stated that if you do not eat breakfast, you will be hungrier later. For me and my body, it’s just not true. I’m not hungry in the morning. I rarely eat breakfast. It does not make me hungrier later. I find that if I eat breakfast, I am hungrier later.

I work with hundreds of ladies, and I have to say that I find that some ladies, they eat breakfast, and some don’t. It all depends on their own bodies. Everything I teach love, is that we become the scientist of our own bodies. We don’t take on all of these rules and all of these things that everyone has told us to do.

We actually look at what works for us. What if all of our diet beliefs and rules were wrong? What if we could create our own rules based on testing our own bodies? This is what I teach my ladies in The Transform Society. We challenge all of it.

Then we decide what we want to believe and what we want to implement as our own rules. Another rule I see is eating at night. For so long, we were told not to eat late at night because you will gain weight. I have seen this over and over again and it’s just not true.

The actual reason is that for many, they are tired at night and eat more non-fuel at night. That is what’s contributing. They’re eating past full. Not the actual time of day. Another rule I see is carbs and the elimination of.

This is such a huge diet industry belief right now. There are beliefs that carbs make you fat, so we’ve created all these rules around carbs and eliminating them. But love, I eat carbs. Rice, potatoes, veggies have carbs, I’ve lost my weight doing it.

None of my ladies have eliminated carbs and they’ve lost 10, 20, 30, 90 pounds. Diet rules were created by the diet industry. I teach my ladies to create their own rules, to take back control of their own weight loss transformation.

I give them the tools so they can lose weight in a way that they can always do. Not just a quick fix that keeps them stuck on the diet roller coaster. So here are the transformational questions for today. Number one, what are your diet rules? And number two, which ones do you want to stop believing? So good, love.

Love, if you are wanting to take this work deeper, The Transform Society is opening in July. If you want a community of women to help and support you and you’re ready to get off the diet roller coaster for good, then sign up for the waitlist. You will get all of the information on when it opens, free trainings, and a brochure mailed right to your home. You can get it all at bflycoaching.com/waitlist. Bye for now, love.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come over to bflycoaching.com. That’s B – F – L – Y coaching dot com. See you next week!

Enjoy the Show?

Facebook Live 5: Magical Food Plans

Ladies, I’m sharing a story with you today, and I know you are all going to feel me on this one. I was carrying a lot of extra weight on my body and I just wanted it all to be gone. We want the weight off fast and we constantly search for a “magical” food plan that will melt away all the pounds.

I did this over and over again with various plans and I know you’re going to find this pattern familiar. I would always start on a Monday after having my last supper eating all the things I wanted, telling myself to buckle down for a few months, but then life happens. I thought the magic would happen if I could just white-knuckle it, but it didn’t. And when I finally got off the diet roller coaster, I discovered where the real magic lies.

Join me today as I share how I found the real magic for permanent weight loss. We don’t need any plan, and my ladies in The Transform Society have found this to be true, too. I invite you to ditch the rules around cutting out food groups or how much exercise you should be doing that you’ve adopted from some article or fitness guru, and start implementing these tips I’m sharing with you today to design a plan that works for you.

If you love this work and you want to go deeper, take my free mini-course. Click here for more information.

I’m so happy to finally announce that we are opening the doors to The Transform Society on July 28th! We’re going to open for only five days, so if you’re ready to do the work, get on the waitlist and join us!


What You’ll Discover:

  • My diet roller coaster journey and how I stopped looking for a “magical” food plan. 
  • Why you don’t need any food plan to lose weight.
  • What I found when I started testing foods and created my own rules. 
  • How to discover the real magic to losing weight. 
  • What keeps you on the diet roller coaster. 


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:

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Ep #41: What If You Were Curious?

What If You Were Curious?

Let me lay out a scenario I see so often with my ladies. You see a number on the scale and you didn’t lose any weight, or maybe you’ve even gained some weight. The beatdown starts, you’re telling yourself you’re a failure, that you’re always going to be overweight, and you stay on the path of overeating.

But what if you could change this cycle? Judgment is never helpful, and it often only makes you want to buffer with food to push down the uncomfortable feelings you’re adding on top of the frustration and disappointment of seeing the number on the scale. Ladies, there is a powerful tool that you can use here to replace judgment with, and it’s curiosity.

Join me today as I show you the power of intentionally getting curious and asking questions that will help you long-term, instead of the judgment and internal beatdowns you might be serving yourself right now. You’ll find that once you shift your mindset, you’ll be able to get creative and feel empowered enough to find the right solutions.

And here are this week’s transformational questions:

  1. Why?
  2. How could I? How could I eat on-plan? How could I tweak what I’m doing? How could I make one small step?
  3. What if? What if weight loss was easy? What if I could learn from my failure? What if I could eat on-plan? What if I could lose weight? 

If you love this work and you want to go deeper, take my free mini-course. Click here for more information.

The Transform Society is opening in July. If you’re wanting to take this work deeper, you want a community to help and support you and love, you’re ready to get off the diet roller coaster, then sign up for the waitlist. You will get all the information, the free trainings, and I will mail you a brochure right to your home with all of the information! 


What You’ll Discover:

  • The power of replacing judgment with curiosity. 
  • Why being curious empowers you, no matter what the scales says. 
  • How getting curious helps you become future-focused and solution-focused. 


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:


Full Episode Transcript:

You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen, episode number 41.

Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, Fortune 100 executive and Certified Life Coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Hello loves. Welcome back to the show. So excited to spend some time with you today. Today, we’re going to talk about curiosity and how it can help you in your weight loss transformation. But as always, before we get into the show, I want to give a listener shout-out to Amy.

She wrote, “Thank you so much for sharing your story about the things that have happened to your son because he is black. I am trying at this time to listen and to examine my own thinking, and your honesty and emotion truly touched me. You, through your blog, have been teaching me how to feel my feelings. All the feelings. And it has made me realize the degree to which I have pushed down anxiety my whole life.

Your explicit instructions for how to let the emotion and the energy flow through my body and to pay attention to how that feels and to what thoughts I’m having has changed my health. I am down to only one migraine a month from many, and I truly believe it is because I’m taking the time to stop and let my feelings flow.

When you said that an emotion lasts 90 seconds, I felt like I could handle anything for 90 seconds. Like you, I’m a mama. My oldest has suffered in the past two years, due to both epilepsy and mental health struggles, manifesting out of nowhere. Your sincere, loving words encourage me. Thank you for all that you are doing.”

Thank you so much, Amy. That was from a Facebook Live that’s on the podcast and it’s such a thoughtful review. It really means so much to me that you took the time to write those beautiful words. And to all the ladies out there who have taken the time to leave a review, I just really appreciate it and I’m so grateful for you.

So ladies, I have to tell you about my little Jaxy. So Jackson is my three-year-old granddaughter and she is just pure joy and so stinking cute. So she’s had a little bit of a lazy eye. So my daughter-in-law and son took her in to the eye doctor.

And it turned out actually that she needed glasses. Like, bifocals. Her vision was pretty impaired. You would have never known. I mean, she never complained. Jaxy is always pointing out my earrings, what I’m wearing. I always thought she saw the tiniest of details.

She would look at my earrings and say, “Mimi, you have the most beautiful earrings,” or I sometimes get flowers painted on my fingernails and she would look at the flowers. She loves all of the flowers and the earrings and the jewelry.

And so I never would have even thought that she couldn’t see. So she just got her glasses and when she put them on, oh my goodness ladies, she said, “Daddy, I can see clear.” And she just kept looking at her hands the whole way home.

She did not know that she could not see. She didn’t know what clear was until she did. She did not know what she did not know. We were having a team meeting that night and she came on the video with her glasses on. I mean seriously, the cutest thing.

We often don’t know what we don’t know. We believe we know the things. I mean, so many times I think I know the things until I learn something that I never knew before. We’ve dieted for so long and we think we know most everything about it.

We still believe, I see so many ladies still believe that a food plan or an exercise plan is the way. If we just find the magical food plan, the magical pill, then everything will be okay.

I see my ladies in The Society though, I see them in The Transform Society put on their glasses for the first time. I see them realize that it’s all been within them, that they can lose weight and that it’s possible.

One of the things I teach in the Society is how to be curious. For so many of my ladies, they stopped asking questions. They believed all the things that they were taught from diet culture. They look at their past and then they believe that it’s their future.

I teach them to ask why. What if? How could I? These questions are so life-changing. So let me give you a scenario I see a lot. You see the number on the scale, and you did not lose any weight. Maybe you’ve gained some weight. And then you just start in the whole beatdown.

You start telling yourself that you’re a failure, that you’re not good enough, that you’re always going to be overweight, and you just beat yourself up. And then you feel frustrated. You feel disappointed. You feel sad. And then my love, you overeat.

But what if you could change that cycle? What if you could be curious instead of judging yourself? I teach my ladies that the number is just data. They can look at it and then decide if they need to tweak something or if they just need to keep doing what they’re doing.

By being curious, asking questions instead of judging, so asking questions like why, looking at the data, it changes the conversation that they’re having with themselves. It puts them back in charge. No beatdown.

My ladies learn how to look at their own data and then be curious about it. Again, with no judgment. Our brains are wired for confirmation bias. We look for evidence to support our own beliefs. So when we look at the scale and have gained weight, or we eat off plan, or we don’t even make a plan, our brain starts serving up thoughts like, “You’re never going to do this. See? This is too hard. You’re a failure.”

But love, when we are curious, it helps us from looking for evidence of what we used to believe. It keeps us open to what we could believe. It gets us asking questions and using the creative part of our brain. We start looking for solutions instead of judgment and beatdowns.

So ladies, if you’re in The Transform Society and you’re listening, we are going to continue to go deep into this in our module, Data versus Drama. And if you’re new to me and you’re just beginning, or you’ve been listening to the podcast for a while, the best step you can take is when you get on the scale or you overeat or you don’t make your realistic plan, you can simply ask yourself these transformational questions.

So here they are. Number one, why? Why is one of the best questions you can ask yourself. Number two, how could I? How could I eat on plan? How could I tweak what I’m doing? How could I make one small step? And number three, what if? What if weight loss was easy? What if I could learn from my failures? What if I could eat on plan? What if I could lose weight?

So good, my love. I hope you all have an amazing week.

The Transform Society is opening in July. If you’re wanting to take this work deeper, you want a community to help and support you and love, you’re ready to get off the diet rollercoaster, then sign up for the waitlist. You will get all of the information of when it opens, the free trainings, and I will mail you a brochure right to your home with all of the information. You can get it at bflycoaching.com/waitlist. Bye for now, love.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come over to bflycoaching.com. That’s B – F – L – Y coaching dot com. See you next week!

Enjoy the Show?

Facebook Live 4: Why Failure is Necessary

Something so many of us ladies struggle with, especially when we’re on the diet roller coaster, is experiencing failure. Whether it’s failing to stick to a food plan or not losing the amount of weight we want to, it’s something we all fear and want to avoid at all cost.

I’m sharing a personal story with you today that I think many of you will be able to resonate with. I was desperate to lose weight and started a plan that I did initially lose weight with, but then, I started slipping. Life happened and I had all the uncomfortable emotions, I hadn’t worked on my beliefs and mindset, and the weight just crept back up again.

Ladies, we’ve all tried various plans and diets to lose weight for good, and we inevitably fail. While failure is extremely uncomfortable to sit with, I’ve learned that it is the arrow that points me to learning something different. So today, I’m showing you just why embracing failure is so necessary and how your failures can act as a guidepost to your success in the future.

If you love this work and you want to go deeper, take my free mini-course. Click here for more information.

We are pushing the opening of The Transform Society to July. We were going to open in the middle of June, but I want to take some time because this is an updated course, and I want the current ladies to be able to give me feedback on it so it’ll be ready for new ladies who want to join! We’ll also be putting on a virtual live event in July close to the opening, so make sure to keep an eye out for that.


What You’ll Discover:

  • My personal story of experiencing failure on my weight loss journey. 
  • Why diets and food plans don’t work long-term. 
  • The key lessons I learned on my weight loss journey. 
  • What long-term weight loss is really all about. 
  • Why failure is so important. 


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:

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Ep #40: Emotional vs Physical Hunger

Physical vs Emotional Hunger

We are about 15 weeks in since the eruption of the coronavirus and I know that so many of my ladies in The Transform Society are feeling all the feels, and they’re using food to push down and push away their emotions. Emotional hunger is something you’re probably familiar with if you’ve been on the diet roller coaster, and today, I’ll be explaining how to identify it and what you can do to overcome it.

For most of us, we buffer when we don’t want to feel negative emotions. We use food and alcohol and a whole array of substances to feel temporarily better. Emotional eating happens without intention, and it’s only prolonging whatever negative emotion you might be feeling in that moment, with an extra layer of guilt and shame afterward, and love, you just don’t need that.

Tune in this week as I show you how to identify the difference between emotional hunger and physical hunger, and I’ll be sharing a couple of tricks that I teach in The Transform Society that you can use in your own life. These solutions are all about coming back into your body and understanding what hunger feels like, and then from there, you’ll be able to pay closer attention because love, you are worth this work.

And here are this week’s transformational questions:

  1. What does physical hunger feel like in your body?
  2. What are the feelings you feel most often when you’re emotional eating?
  3. What does emotional hunger look like for you?

If you love this work and you want to go deeper, take my free mini-course. Click here for more information.

We are pushing the opening of The Transform Society to July. We were going to open in the middle of June, but I want to take some time because this is an updated course and I want the current ladies to be able to give me feedback on it so it’ll be ready for new ladies who want to join! We’ll also be putting on a virtual live event in July close to the opening, so make sure to keep an eye out for that.


What You’ll Discover:

  • The difference between emotional hunger and physical hunger. 
  • Why emotional hunger happens. 
  • How to know when you’re buffering. 
  • 2 tricks you can use to identify the difference between emotional and physical hunger. 


Listen to the Full Episode:


Featured on the Show:


Full Episode Transcript:

You are listening to the Weight Loss for Successful Women podcast with Shannan Christiansen, episode number 40.

Welcome to Weight Loss for Successful Women, a podcast for women who are ready to break the diet cycle and end their struggle with weight for good. Here’s your host, Fortune 100 executive and Certified Life Coach, Shannan Christiansen.

Hello loves. Welcome back to the show. Can you believe episode number 40? I’m so excited about it. It’s been an amazing, amazing journey with you ladies. So today we are going to talk about hunger and what is the difference between emotional and physical hunger.

But before we get into the show, I want to give a listener shout-out to Violet. She wrote, “You are teaching me so much. I did not realize there was a difference between journaling and reflection work. Thank you so much for doing the podcast. It is so nice to find someone that truly has been there, has the thoughts I have and the same feelings, a person that I can tell loves others enough to give herself and time to help others. I am so thankful for you.”

Violet, I am so thankful for you. It means so much to me that you are listening and loving this show. And again, thank you to all the ladies who have taken the time to leave a review. And if you like and love this show, then please leave a review. I would so appreciate it.

Ladies, we are in week 15 since the eruption of the coronavirus. Roughly around 15. I have been working home for 15 weeks. I almost can’t believe it. The time has gone so fast. I live in Arizona and honestly, we’re exploding with cases right now. For us, it has not turned the corner.

I keep hearing over and over again all my loves wanting 2020 to be over, wishing it away. I taught a time leadership class today and I teach that time is our most valuable commodity, that we cannot get more of it. We cannot physically buy another three hours a day.

And trust me love, if I could, I would have bought extra time. I surely would. I have wished time away many times. Wished a Monday away, wished a Wednesday away, wished that I was not feeling the way that I was, wishing my circumstances were different.

I find that through this time, I just have to continue to go inward. I continue to find the benefits, the good, the hope. I appreciate all that is around me. The people, the humans, my loves. I appreciate a FaceTime or a video chat. I sink a little deeper into my husband’s hugs.

I’m feeling all the feelings, good and bad. I’m being coached every week by my coach, I’m doing work on racism, I’m showing up for my ladies in the Transform Society. I’m practicing self-care every day. I’m spending time with my grandbabies; I’m turning off my social media feeds. I’m walking and watching the beautiful butterflies, just loving nature.

I share with you, my love, all the things I’m doing because every moment we have is a moment we get to create. We get to choose love. We can feel all of the negative emotion. We can move through this time and be present with it.

And I wish all of this for you. I’m not wishing this time away. I’m leaning into it. I’m learning and growing. For every moment is the only moment we have, which transitions me into our topic today. I know that so many ladies are feeling hungry, meaning they are feeling so many emotions that they want to push down, push away, and they’re using food to do it.

Emotional hunger happens when we don’t want to feel emotions. We want to buffer. For most of us, we use a substance to buffer like food, alcohol, drugs, Netflix, shopping. I mean, there’s an array of things we use.

Now, it becomes buffering when it has a negative consequence. So if I’m eating on my plan, stopping when I’m feeling satiated, that is not buffering. But if I’m eating until I’m stuffed, eating all the things off my plan, that can be buffering. The negative consequence is eating more than my body needs for fuel.

Netflix can be great, but if I’m binge-watching for 12 hours straight, not doing the things that I want or need to do, like let’s say work for business, then the negative consequence is that I’m not doing the things that serve me. Instead, I’m binging on TV. So the negative consequence is the binging and not getting stuff done.

Emotional eating, emotional hunger is mindless eating. It’s eating without intention. It’s trying to push down the feelings but what ends up happening is that they’re still there. And we’re eventually just prolonging the negative emotion.

We end up still feeling sad, frustrated, but now love, we are beating ourselves up on top of it all. Now physical hunger is a sensation in our bodies. It’s a signal that was built so we would not starve to death. It’s activated by a hormone called ghrelin.

Ghrelin signals our brain that we are hungry, but for most of us who’ve been on the diet rollercoaster, we do not know what actual physical hunger feels like. We just don’t know it. We have been so disconnected from our bodies that we don’t know the sensation of physical hunger.

So what to do, my loves? I go in depth on this for my Society ladies, but I wanted to give you a couple solutions that can help you today. One of the things I teach my ladies in the Transform Society is to first feel what physical hunger feels like in their body.

So many of them will extend the time that they eat breakfast so they can experience what it actually feels like in their body. So if they normally eat, let’s say, at 8am breakfast, they’ll extend it to nine or 10. And then they write all the ways the sensation of physical hunger feels like.

How does it show up in their bodies? This is all about coming back to our bodies, right? Going inward, understanding what a sensation like hunger actually feels like in our body.

Now emotional hunger is when we think we’re hungry, but we go into autopilot and start eating. The trick is to notice the thought that you’re having when you think you are hungry. And notice how you’re feeling.

What are your triggers? Are you stressed? Is it a certain time of the day? Are you tired? Do you feel lonely or sad? If you’re experiencing emotional hunger, sit with the negative emotion. Then write the thoughts that are causing your discomfort.

Writing and reflection is a great way to disrupt the thoughts that you’re having. It can help you to stop eating or maybe not even start eating when you’re not physically hungry.

Now, a really easy trick that I like to use is when I think I’m hungry, I just ask myself, would a chicken breast or a head of broccoli do? And if the only answer my brain serves up is no, you must eat the cupcake, then I know it’s emotional hunger. But if a chicken breast will do, then I know I’m physically hungry.

We can learn to identify if it’s physical or emotional hunger. This is just another tool that can help us get off the diet rollercoaster. When we try to push down emotion with food, it’s still there, love. The pain has not gone away. We then just pile on guilt, shame, and add in a verbal beatdown. Love, you are worth this work. You are worth paying attention to.

So, the transformational questions are what does physical hunger feel like in your body? Question number two, what are the feelings you feel most often when you’re emotional eating? And number three, what does emotional hunger look like for you? So good. Bye for now, loves.

If you love this work and want to go deeper, take my free course. You can learn more about it at bflycoaching.com/free-course. Bye for now, loves.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for Successful Women. If you love what you heard today and want to learn more, come over to bflycoaching.com. That’s B – F – L – Y coaching dot com. See you next week!

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