I was taught to be kind to others. I was taught to speak kindly and to pay attention to how others felt. I thought that I could “hurt” someone else’s feelings. This was reinforced by my amazing parents, school, and society. I worried about what I would say and how it would come off to others. I used to be a total people pleaser, wanting to make others happy. I still love when others are happy or when I get to serve. I taught this to my son, be kind to others, which is a good thing.
But what about me? How kind was I to myself, how did I speak to myself? For most of my life I never really thought about it. I thought it was normal to have negative thoughts about myself. Mostly I just buried the thoughts through disconnection and buffering. I would have thoughts like, I hate my body, you are not good enough, who are you to think that you deserve that, and so on and so on….
There is a different way. You can be kind to yourself. You
can allow a negative thought and learn to replace it with something kinder. You
can learn to love your body, love who you are, love everything that has
happened along your journey. It is possible for you, I promise.
Would you be your best friend with how you speak to yourself? How many negative thoughts do you have about yourself a day? Next time you tell one of your kids to be kind to a stranger or to their brother and sister, don’t forget to tell them to be kind to themselves. And then do it for yourself.