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I admit it, I was obsessed!

shan1126, May 8, 2019May 14, 2019

Have you ever been obsessed about a sugar cookie? Ok, no I mean seriously obsessed. When I lived in Utah, (the baking capital of the world, maybe not officially but for real, they had some serious baked goods) I was introduced to this cookie called the “smart” cookie. It was a thick sugar cookie with a ton of cream cheese frosting on it, for real, it was amazing. I used to sit and think about this cookie and how was I going to get one. I would go wayyy out of my way to drive to get one. A little crazy but seriously I was obsessed.


Sugar cookies was not the only food I would sit and obsess about. I would think about food all of the time, when was my next meal, what should I eat, do I have any sweets at home, if not I better stop on the way home, I mean so much of my brain power would go to thinking about food. It was a way that I could avoid thinking or feeling about what was really going on. Whether I was on a diet or off in a full binge, I was always thinking about food.

One of the tools that has helped me is learning to sit with an urge. An urge in this context is a feeling that comes from a thought in your brain that tells you to “eat it, you must have it”. Most of the time it was more like an impulse to me, I would think, “I want to eat that cookie”, then I would feel this impulse in my body to act. Sitting with an urge/impulse is having the thought, acknowledging it, and then “not” acting on it. Just allowing it to be there. When you allow it, it comes and goes, and then over time the thoughts that create the urge quiet, the can even become non-existent.

It was Easter a few weeks ago and I had Easter candy at our house, I did not have one piece. Crazy, right, anyone who knows me, knows I love Cadbury eggs, like for real loved them. When I first bought the candy at Target, I had an urge, I knew it would be there, I allowed it and then I moved on. Crazy part is that the candy sat in a candy dish for days after the party and I never had an urge for it. That is the power of this process. The power to free yourself from this obsessive and destructive thinking. A way to permanently lose weight.

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